Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Ah, the power of sibling rivalry combined with some strategic sleepy deception! 🌙🎶 Who knew that music practice could be the ultimate alarm clock for the entire household? 😜🎻 #ParentingWin"

asleep, child, effective, family, humor, instrument, parenting, practice, sibling, still

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I just start doing the Macarena when I want to end conversations now.

0

2 months ago

conversation, dance, doing, end, end conversation, humor, i, interaction, just, Macarena, social, social interaction, start, want
I miss when there were so many episodes of every show that they all eventually did one where it was hot, and the air conditioning went out.

0

2 months ago

air, air conditioning, conditioning, episode, episodes, every, heat, hot, humor, i, inconvenience, miss, nostalgia, show, sitcom, summer, TV, TV Show, where
It seems that after checking my bank account, I need to turn to a life of crime.

0

2 months ago

account, after, bank, bank account, checking, crime, desperation, financial, financial struggle, humor, i, irony, joke, life, life of crime, money, need, struggle, turn
I am in favor of equal pay for men on OnlyFans.

0

2 months ago

adult, adult content, am, content, equal, equal pay, equality, favor, humor, i, joke, media, men, OnlyFans, pay, social, social media
I hope some dyslexic people don’t mail Satan instead of Santa.

0

2 months ago

Christmas, dyslexia, hope, humor, i, irony, mail, people, Santa, Satan
Due to unforeskin circumcistances …

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5 months ago

circumcision, due, funny phrase, humor, joke, phrase, pun, wordplay

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

77 shares on Snapchat this month:

I actually check my emails every day in hopes I’m going to get some life-changing news someday.

75 shares on TikTok this month:

My neighbor told me he heard me having sex this morning. I was putting on my shoes.

56 shares on Instagram this month:

Are you telling me these billionaires don’t have my best interests at heart?!

34 shares on Discord this month:

We put a man on the moon in 1969, and if you elect me to be your president, I promise that we will not stop until every man is on the moon.

12 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Stop worrying about being weird and start being weirder.

87 shares on WeChat this month:

If you say something while exhaling smoke, it is 10 times more profound.

50 shares on Telegram this month:

You better pray to whatever god you serve that this email finds you before I do.

50 shares on Threads this month:

Any jar is a swear jar when the lid won’t open.

92 shares on Slack this month:

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice? Also shame on you. Stop foolin’ me, I am pure.

69 shares on Discord this month:

Why do we say ‘slept like a baby’? Babies wake up every two hours crying. I want to sleep like my cat—14 hours, no responsibilities, zero regrets.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

The word aerobics comes from two Greek words: aero, meaning “ability to,” and bics, meaning “withstand tremedous boredom.”

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

Are you my appendix? Cause you seem kind of useless to me.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

Never miss a good chance to shut up.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

Partying hard on this Friday night, and by partying hard, I mean laying on my bed starfish-style.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

Calling it a situationship, and the whole time, the situation is that they don’t want you.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

Insulting me won’t work. I already said that to myself earlier.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has shared:

I’m uncomfortable around tall people. What if they pick me up and put me on their shoulders?

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

If you ever see me running, it’s either away from my problems or towards an ice cream van.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

Friendship is when you don’t tidy up before visitors arrive.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

I think my new neighbors are creeps. They seem to be looking into my window every time I’m looking out my window to see what they are doing.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Messenger:

Men will ruin your whole life and come back and like your Instagram story.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

If I ever say “with all due respect”, please understand that there is none.

Going viral on Discord:

Me: Please let me sleep! Brain: Nope, we have to stay up together and go over every bad life decision we have made so far.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

The awkward moment when someone’s zipper is down and you don’t know whether to tell them or not.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Turns out “V for Vendetta” is not an educational movie and it won’t teach your kids the alphabet.

Just shared via WeChat:

Never say never. Unless someone asks you when you want to go camping. Then the right answer is always “Never.”

Just shared via Discord:

Humidity is great because then people think it’s not my fault that my hair looks like this.

Trending via TikTok:

You never realize how long a minute is until you’re doing cardio.

Just landed via Messenger:

This meeting could have been an unread email.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Aura is the real business card.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Telling your child their sibling is still asleep a very effective way to get them to practice their instrument.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I just start doing the Macarena when I want to end conversations now.

I miss when there were so many episodes of every show that they all eventually did one where it was hot, and the air conditioning went out.

It seems that after checking my bank account, I need to turn to a life of crime.

I am in favor of equal pay for men on OnlyFans.

I hope some dyslexic people don’t mail Satan instead of Santa.

Due to unforeskin circumcistances …

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨