Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

No one suddenly needs anything more than a kid whose mom has just sat down and gotten comfortable.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

We all have needs. I need my wife to go run errands so I can swipe the last donut.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

I commented to a friend that I didn’t know how goofy Scream was. It turns out I have never seen Scream. I saw Scary Movie.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

Yeah, Instagram is bad for our mental health, but what about Outlook?

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

The most surprising part of adulthood is parenting your parents.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

Why insult someone when you can say something nice in a very sarcastic tone?

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

I hope this email blows your head smoove off.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

When they know you know they did you dirty, they stay gone. And that’s the best thing.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

If you ever need me, call me any time, day or night, and I’ll return your call when I get around to it.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

I’m so old that when I take a walk down memory lane, I get lost.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

237 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,506

Funny Quotes Topics

17,571

Funny Quotes Images

15,506

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,268

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Twitch:

I just learned the professional way to say “I told you so”: “This was identified early on as a likely outcome.”

Trending via Twitch:

Keep smiling, it makes people wonder what you’re up to.

Spotted on Messenger:

Me going to work because I’m too honest to scam people, too shy to be an influencer, too good for a sugar daddy, and too dumb for crypto.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Dinosaurs never had coffee, and we see how that turned out.

Spotted on Messenger:

Being an adult is like folding a fitted sheet.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Realizing this yogurt I’m eating is more active and cultured than I am.

Spotted on Snapchat:

The tag on my jeans says “Relaxed” so it obviously doesn’t have children.

Going viral on Messenger:

3 friends is enough. 1 for the movie theater, 1 for drinks and apps, 1 for texting concerning mental health information.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I don’t mind pulling your cart — I’ve been chasing the carrot anyway, and it’s in the same direction.

Live now on Instagram:

I’m never really sure what to do with my hands when I go jogging, so I don’t go jogging.

That moment when you’re reading but realize you forgot to understand.

3 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When your brain decides to go on vacation without telling you 🤔📚💭

distraction, focus, forgetfulness, forgot, funny moment, humor, moment, reading, realization, realize, understand, understanding

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I start off my mornings with coffee and low expectations.

0

2 months ago

coffee, expectations, humor, i, low, mornings, motivation, routine, sarcasm, start
It sure is strange that after Tuesday the rest of the week spells WTF.

0

2 months ago

day, humor, strange, Tuesday, week, WTF
I hope this email kills us both.

0

2 months ago

both, communication, email, frustration, hope, humor, i, sarcasm, stress, us, work
Isolation, the most goated coping mechanism. I love talking to no one and losing my mind alone.

0

5 months ago

alone, coping, coping mechanism, goated, health, humor, i, isolation, losing, losing mind, love, mechanism, mental, mental health, mind, most, solitude, talking, talking to no one
I accidentally used my dog’s shampoo today, and now I’m feeling like such a good girl.

0

2 months ago

accidentally, dog, dogs, feeling, girl, good, grooming, humor, i, lighthearted, pet, playful, self-deprecating, shampoo, today, used
Planking is the only time we appreciate time.

0

2 months ago

activity, appreciate, fun, fun activity, humor, only, planking, social, social trend, time, trend

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

72 shares on Reddit this month:

Tornados are just a bunch of ghosts fighting over a cow.

57 shares on Discord this month:

Not to brag, but my children already knew everything I told them today.

35 shares on WeChat this month:

Video games are great. They let you try out your craziest fantasies. For example, on The Sims, you can have a job and a house.

72 shares on Messenger this month:

The man who invented the Ferris wheel never met the man who invented the merry-go-round. They traveled in different circles.

94 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Be bold, be italic, but never regular.

45 shares on WeChat this month:

Using my one phone call to call Santa.

17 shares on Telegram this month:

You’re an adult if you’re happy every time the mailbox is empty.

86 shares on WeChat this month:

Having a kid is so fun when you’re childish, like yeah, it’s my turn with the slime, boo.

46 shares on Facebook this month:

For those who don’t want Alexa listening in on your conversations, they’re making a male version that doesn’t listen to anything.

85 shares on WeChat this month:

My new coffee table book, “Accidental Screenshots,” is available for pre-order now.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇦 has downloaded:

If you ask him what he admires most about a woman and he says brains, you’ve got yourself a zombie.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has copied:

Paid my mortgage so don’t ask me to come out. I’m getting my money’s worth.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

If I was a weather man, I’d leak the weather early to pretty women.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

Death by a thousand stupid questions.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

Are you gonna confess your undying love for me or what, bro?

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

I wanna be a jellyfish— no heart, no brain, no feelings, no pain— just blub blub blub.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has bookmarked:

“AI is coming for your jobs!” I’d like to see AI send 5 emails a day and check their fantasy football line-ups on and off for 8 hours.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

I never forget to eat, but I do eat to forget.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

Cleaning your kid’s room will piss you off, cause why is my Airfryer in here?

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

People don’t hate working, they hate working and still being poor.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Welcome to your 40s, you now don’t understand a single word anyone under 25 is saying.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Turning in bad essays to professors you have a personal relationship with is the most humiliating thing ever.

Breaking via WeChat:

Why do people always assume it’s a compliment when I tell them their baby looks just like them?

Spotted on Slack:

Last year I had no valentine, this year I also have no valentine. Consistency!

Going viral on Twitch:

When the salesman from the hearing aid company calls, I stay on the line and answer every question with ‘What?’

Trending via Telegram:

Weekends are a scam. You spend one day exhausted and the other anxious… like, what was that?

Spreading quickly via X:

Work can be tiring at times, and you might feel like quitting. But remember those plane tickets.

Trending via Threads:

According to autocorrect, my favorite Star Wars character is Bob’s Feet.

Going bananas on Instagram:

Imagine she’s home alone, bored out of her mind, and she STILL won’t put that laundry away. She is me.

Making waves on YouTube:

How quickly family vacations go from “Omg, we only have 4 days left” to “Omg, we still have 4 days left”

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

That moment when you’re reading but realize you forgot to understand.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I start off my mornings with coffee and low expectations.

It sure is strange that after Tuesday the rest of the week spells WTF.

I hope this email kills us both.

Isolation, the most goated coping mechanism. I love talking to no one and losing my mind alone.

I accidentally used my dog’s shampoo today, and now I’m feeling like such a good girl.

Planking is the only time we appreciate time.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨