Trendy Funny Quotes

  • “Fries or salad?” sums up every adult decision you have to make.
  • Talking to animals doesn’t make you crazy, hearing them talk back does.
  • If I like you I keep you close, if not I keep you at a distance so I can mime squishing your head between my thumb and forefinger.
  • A beaver is an otter that has studied architecture.
  • I don’t know who needs to hear this, but no one in the world is judging you as much as you’re judging yourself. People online: Hold my beer.
  • Diarrhea awareness week starts today. Runs through Sunday.