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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

Maybe her DMs haven’t been working for 2 months.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

Life’s too short to remove the USB drive safely.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

Every time I watch “The Godfather”, I notice some new detail (they’re Italian???).

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

I’ve just found my wide pants again. They weren’t gone at all, they’re just my tight pants now.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

Blocking someone isn’t enough, I want them to get lice.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

Elections make you feel like we’re all in divorce court waiting to see who gets custody of us.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

People always ask me “Do you believe in God?” and I say of course it’s important to have self-belief.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

The trick is to not let people know how weird you are until it’s too late for them to back out.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has shared:

I would like to opt out of WW3, por favor.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

Whoever came up with the name wallpaper really nailed it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

789 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,951

Funny Quotes Topics

13,923

Funny Quotes Images

10,951

21 minutes ago

3,434

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on YouTube:

That feeling when you take the first bite of your favourite food, that’s called chewphoria.

Going viral on Twitch:

People aren’t so bad if you stay indoors and don’t talk to them.

Trending via TikTok:

People who are on Twitter and put intelligent in their bio, good one.

Reported on Twitch:

Waffles are just pancakes with abs.

Just shared via Reddit:

Relationship status: I love my bed.

Going viral on Twitch:

Today I broke my personal record for most consecutive days lived.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Everyone is a genius until they try to use someone else’s microwave.

Trending via TikTok:

Rapunzel, let down your CVS receipt!

Seen just now on Threads:

Whoever thinks money doesn’t buy happiness can deposit it in my bank account.

Just shared via Discord:

If you ever need nothing, I’m here for you.

The two types of video games are kill everything that moves and Microsoft Excel.

4 months ago

The two types of video games are kill everything that moves and Microsoft Excel.

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Commentary:
Ah, yes, the classic gamer dichotomy: unleashing havoc on virtual worlds or meticulously organizing spreadsheets. It's like choosing between chaos and order, between slaying dragons and slaying data. 🎮💥💼 Who needs real-life adventures when you can battle monsters or conquer formulas from the comfort of your own screen? Choose your weapon: a sword or a mouse—both equally formidable in their own realms! ⚔️🖱️ #GamerLife #Spread

activity, everything, excel, game, games, humor, kill, microsoft, moves, types, video, video game

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

789 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,951

Funny Quotes Topics

13,923

Funny Quotes Images

10,951

21 minutes ago

3,419

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

One thing no one mentions about being an adult is how much time you debate with yourself over keeping a cardboard box because it’s a really good box.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has bookmarked:

Being a girl must be so easy. All you do is cry all day and text 10 different guys.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

Not trying to brag but I just beat the high score on this blood pressure machine.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has downloaded:

My hobby is misidentifying dinosaurs so my daughter can correct me.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

Apparently, all my new nephew wants to do is eat and sleep, which means he’s already a lot like me.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

The ’90s were a time of blissful ignorance where we expected rock stars to sleep with groupies.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

I hate it when my AirPods die instead of me.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has shared:

I can’t watch Sex and the City anymore, because I get really upset at how much money these ladies have.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

They should list at least one alien “as himself” in the Star Wars credits.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

Establish dominance by maintaining eye contact whilst twerking.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WeChat:

I always ask for a receipt so I can keep them in my purse for 86 years.

Just shared via Telegram:

I don’t want to alarm anyone, but my doctor says I have an irreversible terminal condition called aging.

Making waves on Slack:

I hate when my kids ask me impossible questions like: What day is it?

Breaking via Telegram:

Sex is so embarrassing. Like, why did I want to do that to you?

Shared recently on TikTok:

You ever get surprised by your own recurring issues? Like, come on man, I thought we were past this.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Nothing says sexy like a pair of sensible, silky polka dot PJs.

Making waves on TikTok:

The feminine urge to act clueless while knowing everything.

Just shared via X:

Helvetica is my favorite font that sounds like a heavy metal band.

Making waves on Discord:

Getting the house to yourself for a night is basically winning the lottery.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

They need to invent a job for people who aren’t good at anything nor motivated nor social.

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