Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

When I say I’m Christmas shopping the “for myself” is silent.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

Tattoos are a great convo starter. So as an introvert, I kinda regret getting them.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

They say there’s no such thing as a stupid question, but then they’ll go and wake you up to ask if you’re asleep.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

The difference between us is that people can peck you and I’m impeccable.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

I’m glad it’s not snowing. I can’t imagine shoveling snow in this heat.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

I crashed my bike in 1989 and hurt my knee real bad. We didn’t have social media back then so I’m telling you guys now.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

My love language is being sent money.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

Hey, are you an aurora borealis or why am I waiting in vain for you to appear?

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Yeah, I work at the fart bar. Yup. I’m a fartender. Farts on me tonight!

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

The clitoris has 8,000 nerves, if you gonna get on my nerves, get on one of those.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

764 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,926

Funny Quotes Topics

13,898

Funny Quotes Images

10,926

Updated

43 minutes ago

Users Online

3,434

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Reddit:

I just paid my taxes. The roads should be fixed any day now.

Spotted on Instagram:

I take issue with furniture that deliberately moves 1 inch when you’re in a rush to get by.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Things I hate about group work: The group.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Since I’ve stayed away from most people, I get on much better with people.

Breaking via Twitch:

Subtitles are for when you’re eating chips.

Trending via Facebook:

Getting older means talking to less people and complaining about more people.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

She left me because of my poor English. But I doesn’t care.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I would like you to meet my significant other. Her name is Cheese.

Making waves on Twitch:

Shoulda named my daughter Calculus cause damn she’s complicated.

Trending via YouTube:

Sorry I’m late, I got here as soon as I wanted to.

They invented the word metallic, because irony was already taken.

They invented the word metallic, because irony was already taken.
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Commentary:
Well, talk about a creative workaround! 🤣 Looks like the English language played its own cheeky game of hide and seek with these words. The inventors must have had a good chuckle about this one! 🤖🔠 #WordplayWin

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

764 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,926

Funny Quotes Topics

13,898

Funny Quotes Images

10,926

Updated

43 minutes ago

Users Online

3,430

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

I delete posts cause I be getting mature over the hours.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has viewed:

My handwriting makes a pharmacist look like a calligrapher.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

Please don’t dm me with the intention of dating me. You deserve less.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

Sorry I was late, I was disassociating in the shower.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

Great news everyone! The priest who took my confession is expected to make a full recovery.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

We are all just prisoners here of our phone device.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

When I try to figure out rows vs. columns, I just row away in my boat of confusion!

Someone from 🇪🇪 has viewed:

Sorry I missed your call when I pressed decline.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

If you think one of my posts is about you, it isn’t. Except this one.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

Female dragonflies will fake their own deaths to avoid mating with unwanted males. They are like, “Ugh, here comes Carl again. Play dead, girl!“

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Twitch:

I hate when people call my phone! I don’t use it for that.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Dear brain, please stop thinking so much exactly when it’s time to fall asleep.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Women love deciding to never talk to you again, and actually do it.

Going viral on Discord:

When there’s food around, our cat is like an adorable, fluffy shark circling round.

Just shared via Telegram:

Taking a phone to school in primary was like smuggling drugs.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

November moving quicker than two lesbians who met three days ago.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Instead of cleaning my house, I just watch episodes of hoarders on TV and then I think “Wow, my house looks awesome!”

Just landed via Messenger:

I’m a total go with the flow kinda person as long as the flow is meticulously scheduled well in advance and there are no mid-flow changes whatsoever.

Just landed via Facebook:

I had bad luck with women twice. The first left me, the second stayed.

Trending via WhatsApp:

If GPT-5 will have ‘Ph.D.-level intelligence’, then GPT-6 will have the intelligence of someone who decided not to get a PhD.

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