Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

When I die, I hope I’m remembered for my ability to take any bad situation and make it worse.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has viewed:

The older I get, the more I realize being in a hurry is a terrible way to live your life.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has shared:

Autumn at last. Sitting on the sofa all day with a blanket and tea and watching movies. Just like in summer, but with a blanket and tea.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

It’s never too early to start making bad decisions.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has downloaded:

Everybody thinks “Free Hugs” signs are cute, unless you’re a boa constrictor.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

My goal weight is getting a magician to saw me in half.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

It’s so peaceful when you have no interest in other people’s business.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

Life is full of questions. Idiots are full of answers.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

I feel so discombobulated when supermarkets switch up the aisles without texting me first.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

I believe libraries are our proof that we once valued curiosity.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,507

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Threads:

Today’s politics make me think we’re living in a movie where the villains actually win.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Hello bedtime my old friend, my brain is laughing once again.

Spotted on Threads:

If I ever find out who stole my identity, I’ll pay all their debts and ruin their credit score just for fun.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

The problem is that younger me didn’t account for the fact that there’d be an older me.

Going viral on Instagram:

Fuzzy socks on and ready for anything.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Training a cat is very easy. After a few days, you do what she wants.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

My favorite hobby is withering away.

Making waves on Reddit:

I’m not a 10. I’m more like two 5s held together by cheese and chocolate.

Seen just now on Facebook:

I wish I could put an AirTag on my sanity.

Making waves on Discord:

Money can’t buy happiness, until you’re on vacation and then you realize it definitely can.

Voice messages. Just call, goddamnit!

1 month ago

Humorous text about voice messages urging callers to just pick up the phone.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Who knew a simple 'hello' could cause such drama? 🙄 Voice messages – for those times when a call just won't cut it, but typing a text is just too much effort. 😂 Keep the communication confusion going with the modern-day struggle of leaving voice notes! 📱🎤 #JustCallMeMaybe"

call, communication, frustration, humor, just, message, technology, voice, voice message

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

18 shares on Snapchat this month:

Anyone who wants to learn how to be humble, feel free to talk to me. There’s nothing like learning from the best.

61 shares on Discord this month:

Have you ever wanted to grab somebody by the shoulders, give them a good shake and whisper “Nobody cares!”

61 shares on Pinterest this month:

Anyone who thinks being a pessimist isn’t any fun fails to appreciate the joy of saying, ‘I told you so.’

13 shares on WhatsApp this month:

You know what I never see anymore are those old alcoholics with the weird noses.

90 shares on Discord this month:

Next time I lose my mind I swear I’m not even going to look for it any more.

56 shares on Slack this month:

I’m begging for a day to be added in between Saturday and Sunday.

93 shares on Pinterest this month:

Don’t think my brain is braining properly today.

72 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The only thing I gained so far this year is weight.

56 shares on Pinterest this month:

I wonder if the guy who came up with the term “One Hit Wonder” came up with any other phrases?

67 shares on Slack this month:

I’m not a perfectionist. I’m more of a good-enoughist.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I was having a great time until I remembered that I was ugly.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Why do coffee beans smell so good, and coffee breath is like bleh?

12 folks are currently checking 👀

You should be able to google what someone said to you at the bar last night.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

So grateful for pillows. My head works hard, it deserves its own bed.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

The person opposite me has a donut. I do not have a donut. That should be my donut. This person is now my arch nemesis.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

You ever see a woman so beautiful it makes you momentarily mentally ill?

13 folks are currently checking 👀

You’re not a knight in shining armor, you’re just a knob in Under Armour.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s a myth that we only use 10% of our brain, but I definitely know people who use less than that.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Spell your crush’s name backwards, mine is yenom.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

My kids practically have medical degrees they’re at the nurse so much.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,528

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇰 has bookmarked:

Can’t wait to put up holiday lights so life can be equally crappy but festively so.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

I’m so good at missing early morning meetings, I can do it with my eyes closed.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

Never vacuuming so I don’t disrupt my carpet’s natural micro biome.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

I wanna date one of those guys who really loves their girlfriend.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has copied:

The only way I’m gonna hit the gym is if I accidentally drive into it.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

What did people do before alarm clocks? Just go to bed like, “Hope I wake up in time for work tomorrow.”

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

I really hope my house is haunted and not in need of structural repairs.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

“You handled it so well.” Nah, I didn’t. I lost my spark, felt crazy, distanced myself from everyone, and hated myself.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

My favorite part of socializing is when it’s over.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

The biggest lesson employment has taught me is that efficient workers get punished with more work.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Twitch:

I am cutting contact with my 3-year-old narcissist nephew.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

We’ve all at least once caught our toes when putting on our knickers and jumped around the room like idiots.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Can you check if my lips taste like cherries?

Just landed via Snapchat:

What happened to the art of just liking one person?

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I walk around like everything’s fine, but deep down, inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off.

Making waves on Threads:

I never forget a face, but in your case, I’ll be glad to make an exception.

Trending via Reddit:

Pitching a sitcom where all the top people running a major city have been arrested and by chain of command the person in charge is now a librarian.

Freshly posted on X:

My husband asked me if he had any annoying habits then got offended during the PowerPoint presentation.

Seen just now on Instagram:

I can usually cope with the opinions of others because I don’t listen.

Just shared via Discord:

Drinking a couple of beers and then getting onto Red Dead Redemption, and just petting my horse and feeding it apples.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴