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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

You ever have one of those days that require the use of both of your middle fingers?

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

But have you tried getting slow neck kisses and soft ear whispers about it?

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

I heard you like bad girls. Well, I’m bad. At everything.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has downloaded:

The bowling ball actually hangs out with the pins after work. There isn’t beef there.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

Tornados are just a bunch of ghosts fighting over a cow.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

Living your life to the fullest does not have to involve selfies with bison.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

Every person you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Make it worse by asking if they’re drinking enough water.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

With a cat on your lap, you deal better with the crap.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

I like driving by myself. I just played the same song 36 times.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

Non-parents be like: I would simply instruct the toddler to do something he doesn’t want to do, and he would obey.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

18 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,725

Funny Quotes Topics

15,374

Funny Quotes Images

12,725

Updated

44 minutes ago

Users Online

3,459

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Telegram:

I hate to brag but I excel at my faults.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

The internal struggle between wanting to be productive and just wanting to nap all day.

Seen just now on Discord:

I was in Paris with a boyfriend once and he lit a candle in Notre Dame in order to ask God to raise the price of Bitcoin.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

For this Halloween I’ve trained my eyebrows to leap off my face and destroy those who’ve angered me.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Sorry for not keeping in touch. I literally have nothing to say.

Just shared via Messenger:

There’s protein in foods that have never been protein before.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Yes, liquor store clerk, I do need help. But I decided to come here instead.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Shout out to all you people out there who get asked if you’re okay a lot even though that’s the only facial expression you have.

Going viral on Reddit:

The evening news: Where they begin with “Good evening” and then proceed to tell you why it’s not.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I didn’t lose an hour of sleep. The hour of sleep lost me.

We really grew up in the best era to be a kid, and the worst era to be an adult.

We really grew up in the best era to be a kid, and the worst era to be an adult.
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Commentary:
Adulting is like trying to fold a fitted sheet—super confusing but somehow you just go with it! 😉🛌🎢

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

18 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,725

Funny Quotes Topics

15,374

Funny Quotes Images

12,725

Updated

44 minutes ago

Users Online

3,467

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Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇶🇦 has downloaded:

*Googles: How to fake your own death and erase existence before 9am Monday morning.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has downloaded:

I’ve tasted being the bigger person, I’ve also tasted matching energy. I recommend no contact.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

Nurse: “This may hurt.” Me: “My life hasn’t been much fun either.”

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

Birthday sex is having sex to celebrate your parents having sex.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has shared:

Twitter is basically a psychiatric ward where all the patients diagnose each other.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

Cupid’s arrow should have just killed me instead.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

Gatekeeping how insanely handsome I am by looking like total shit all the time.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has shared:

Thursday is really unnecessary. Today could’ve been Friday.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

I might look calm, but in my head I’ve punched you in the face three times.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

Fun fact: a person’s music taste can actually tell their intelligence level.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via YouTube:

Sometimes I delay my haircut intentionally to look rugged just to make that glow-up more iconic.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

We use our phones to watch videos that remind us of what life was like before we had phones.

Going viral on Snapchat:

I don’t remember if I took my pills, but I can’t check because I can’t remember where I put my glasses.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

My wife refuses to hire a housekeeper because she doesn’t want them to see this mess.

Making waves on Instagram:

I get so embarrassed for no reason after posting on social media. Like, why am I showing my life?

Spotted on Snapchat:

I respect perfume commercials being like we can’t show you a smell mind if we just go insane for 30 seconds.

Shared recently on X:

How old is older? Because I’m still waiting for this wise thing to kick in.

Reported on Slack:

Proposing at someone else’s wedding is out. Die at their funeral like a real man.

Making waves on WeChat:

I refuse to learn the color coding for heart emojis. Your heart means what I want it to, and vice versa.

Spotted on Threads:

I bought a little notebook to keep track of who’s above the law.

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