What career is most compatible with the unemployed lifestyle?

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

If my wife and I got divorced and moved to separate states, I’m convinced I would still hear her chewing.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has bookmarked:

Welcome to adulthood. The weekend is your only time to catch up on everything, but also your only time to do absolutely nothing.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

HR has told me to stop saying ‘How stupid can you be?’ to members of staff. They’re worried it’s being taken as a challenge.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

People who play golf don’t concern me nearly as much as the people who watch it.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has copied:

Dear women, when you’re not around we load the dishwasher properly.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has bookmarked:

I bet before the band got popular, Barenaked Ladies concerts had a lot of pissed off attendees.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

Eatіng іn bed іs much better. Everythіng’s a napkіn.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has bookmarked:

You know you’re getting older when you keep asking “Why do they have to make the instructions so small?”

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

Whenever my hormones try to get me to reproduce after all, I go to IKEA and watch the goings-on there. After that, I’m good again.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

A Twitter swear jar could end world hunger.