When society eventually breaks down and we are left to rebuild civilization, I hope there are people who still know how to make cheese.

62 shares on WeChat this month:

Everybody’s back hurts until it’s time to have sexy time.

25 shares on TikTok this month:

You wish you had this many chins.

36 shares on Discord this month:

Not to brag, but I don’t need alcohol to send texts I’ll regret.

64 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My favorite part of football is when they feed the players water like they’re hamsters.

16 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My favorite part about talking to my teens is when they give me direct eye contact, listen intently, nod understandingly and then do the exact opposite of what I just said.

64 shares on Messenger this month:

That awkward moment when you have to pretend that you like the gift.

89 shares on Instagram this month:

King Kong should’ve been able to find a better place to hide than the top of the tallest building in the middle of New York City.

65 shares on Messenger this month:

Blocking isn’t enough. I wanna throw tomatoes at you like you’re a medieval criminal.

26 shares on Discord this month:

Reading is a gateway drug to being less stupid.

38 shares on Pinterest this month:

Wednesday is the part of the novel where the heroine stares out the window and questions everything.