Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

Clearing her mind with a brisk walk along the foggy shoreline.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

Sorry I can’t carpool to work. That’s the time I use to angry scream.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has copied:

Entered this world crying, and honestly, not much has changed.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

You don’t realize how incorrect and annoying YouTube video essays are until they’re about something you like.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has copied:

Maybe your dog is barking at my luggage because he doesn’t enjoy his job, officer.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has downloaded:

The day I start waking up early it’s over for you all.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has bookmarked:

People argue with me more in my head than they do in real life.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has bookmarked:

My greatest aspiration is to one day solve a murder on a train.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

I like when the superheroes that can fly pick up and carry the ones that can’t.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has viewed:

Carrying my phone from room to room like a Victorian woman and her lantern.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,659

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Messenger:

I hate texting someone something freaky at night, and they reply in the morning like it’s still the vibe. Shut up. The sun’s out. I’m pure again.

Making waves on Twitch:

If a door closes, I’m just going to open it again.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Having to confirm your past purchases over the phone with your bank’s fraud department is a truly harrowing moment of self-examination for chronic little treat buyers.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Life is like a helicopter. I don’t know how to operate a helicopter.

Just landed via Threads:

Sure, I could keep my thoughts to myself but I can’t see “Likes” in my journal.

Spotted on Facebook:

I would pay extra for a dental hygienist who was comfortable with silence.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I’m sick of blessings in disguise. I am ready for a blessing with absolutely no disguise whatsoever.

Breaking via Discord:

“I’m sure it’ll turn up” – Translation: I’m bored of helping you look.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Some people post such depressing love shit that I start to miss their exes myself!

Trending via WhatsApp:

The first 7 days of the week aren’t for me.

Why fall in love when you can fall asleep?

4 weeks ago

Witty text about choosing sleep over love, playful and humorous vibe.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Because pillows never break your heart! 🛏️😴❤️

asleep, fall, humor, love, relationship, rest, sleep, why

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Your secret is safe with me and my sister.

1 month ago

humor, me, relationship, safe, secret, sister, trust
Want to know what someone is really like? Play Monopoly with them.

1 month ago

activity, competitive, fun, fun activity, game, humor, interaction, know, Monopoly, personality, play, relationship, social, social interaction, someone, want
I have more trips planned than I have money.

4 weeks ago

budget, finance, humor, i, money, planned, planning, travel, trip
How old were you when you found out people in porn aren’t actually in love?

1 month ago

actually, adult, adult content, age, content, found, humor, innocence, love, old, people, porn, realization, relationship
Call me dramatic, but I think I deserve a love confession in the rain.

4 weeks ago

call, confession, deserve, drama, dramatic, emotion, humor, i, love, me, rain, relationship, romantic, think
Never underestimate my ability to fall asleep in a moving vehicle.

4 weeks ago

ability, asleep, fall, humor, moving, nap, never, sleep, travel, underestimate, vehicle

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

69 shares on Facebook this month:

Whoever invented the gender reveal party needs to be launched into the sun.

69 shares on Snapchat this month:

It’s so hot, ice bears are opening lemonade stands.

29 shares on Pinterest this month:

This heat made me realize I won’t survive in hell, I gotta change.

21 shares on TikTok this month:

I talk a lot of shit for someone who is startled by my own toast popping up while I’m watching it. Every. Single. Time.

41 shares on TikTok this month:

It’s awkward touching hands with another man inside a popcorn bag, especially if you don’t know the man and he doesn’t know you’re eating his popcorn.

48 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’m not making any resolutions. I think it’s time for the years to be better, not me.

44 shares on X this month:

If at first you don’t succeed, it’s only attempted murder.

17 shares on Reddit this month:

Born to be a hater but forced to understand where you’re coming from.

36 shares on WhatsApp this month:

“I’ll worry about it next time.” Me pissing off future me.

37 shares on Reddit this month:

My boss doesn’t want dogs in the office. But he didn’t say anything about alpacas.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

The year flies by when you’re scrolling.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the best thirst trap poster of them all?

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

Humanity doesn’t always make a compelling case for its continued existence.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

Bartenders be like “here’s that receipt, I’ll go ahead and put it on the wettest part of the bar”.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

It’s like 10,000 steps when all you need is a nap.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

There are 400 billion stars in our galaxy and perhaps two trillion galaxies in total, and I just wonder if Miss Universe fully understands her achievement.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has bookmarked:

The older I get, the more I understand why roosters just scream to start their day.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

Just say, “My future husband would never do that,” and move on.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has viewed:

You ever get road rage while walking behind someone moving slowly at the grocery store?

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

Your Honor, that doesn’t sound like me.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WhatsApp:

Why is it cute when a baby falls asleep clutching a bottle. Yet, when I do it, it’s “concerning”?

Just shared via Reddit:

I love when people find out I meant every word I said.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

If Monday were available for purchase at IKEA, it would be called “Fekking Hell”.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

Is it healthier to drink tap water and let the fluoride calcify my pineal gland or drink bottled spring water and let micro plastics settle in my balls?

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Comments other people make during a movie are annoying. Comments I make during a movie enhance the experience.

Seen just now on Telegram:

My daughter says I’m making it up! Do you remember having to carry a quarter for the payphone, just in case?

Going viral on Instagram:

It’s important to get out of the house every once and a while to remind yourself of why you don’t go out.

Going viral on Discord:

Your Majesty” would be the best name for a cat.

Just landed via Reddit:

Another day without sex, but a mosquito just sucked on my neck and I moaned a little bit.

Going viral on Instagram:

Single, not sure how to mingle.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Why fall in love when you can fall asleep?

Keep the laugh going 😂

Your secret is safe with me and my sister.

Want to know what someone is really like? Play Monopoly with them.

I have more trips planned than I have money.

How old were you when you found out people in porn aren’t actually in love?

Call me dramatic, but I think I deserve a love confession in the rain.

Never underestimate my ability to fall asleep in a moving vehicle.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨