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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

People who read and research will always sound crazy to people who don’t.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

An orgy where everyone looks identical is called a doppelgängerbänger.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

Maybe hot chocolate wants to be called beautiful chocolate at least one time.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

Please don’t send me mixed signals, I don’t even understand the clear ones.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

If you’re thinking what I’m thinking, you need professional help.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

They should send the Epstein list to everyone’s phones like that U2 album.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

Every day, I go to work and draw a little tick on everyone who didn’t say goodbye to me the day before.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

I can’t be bothered with people that can’t be bothered.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

As I get older, I’m understanding why everything needs to be done before 12 p.m.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

Santa has the right idea: only visit people once a year, eat a snack, leave early.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,354

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Messenger:

Gonna start using “with all dude respect”.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

“I’m at a point in my life where I don’t go anywhere unless I absolutely have to.”

Just landed via Reddit:

I don’t need to touch grass, I need to touch one million dollars cash.

Just shared via Slack:

My favorite part of parenting is when the kids are bored enough to entertain themselves, but getting to that point is excruciating.

Going viral on Facebook:

Hate when I view someone’s story, and it’s their birthday.

Just shared via Threads:

If love is the answer then what was the question?

Spotted on Twitch:

Getting stoned when you have a cat is awesome because it will just walk in and I’m immediately cracking up. Like, look at this dude, I bloody love this guy.

Breaking via Messenger:

(While my wife opens up her Christmas present) Remember when you said we needed milk?

Just landed via YouTube:

Always funny to see motivational posts from people I know are toxic in real life.

Making waves on Threads:

I need to stop drinking so much. Did I say drinking? I meant thinking. I definitely need to drink more.

“Winter is literally the best season.” Okay, husky, go sit outside then.

Playful quote about winter and huskies, highlighting humor and seasonal fun.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
Oh, so winter is the best season, huh? 🌨️❄️ Sure thing, husky, go enjoy the frosty delights outside! Hope you've got your fur coat and earmuffs ready! 🐾🐕 #WinterWonderland #ChillyHusky

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Keep the laugh going 😂

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Social Media Stars ⭐

38 shares on YouTube this month:

Lately life has been all panic no disco.

16 shares on Facebook this month:

Tested positive for being single af

54 shares on Threads this month:

I think they’ve made more Kung-Fu Panda movies in the last 20 years than they’ve made actual pandas.

92 shares on Instagram this month:

Incredibly annoying that exercising, eating right, and drinking water can make you actually feel good.

88 shares on TikTok this month:

Every few months, the urge to eat buttered toast will possess you.

44 shares on Instagram this month:

Nothing brings neighbors together like a few cops cars in front of another neighbor’s house that no one likes.

28 shares on Discord this month:

I don’t always seize the day. Sometimes I poke the day with my index finger and go, ew, ew, ew, ew.

93 shares on TikTok this month:

When you’re using Grok, the A in Al just stands for Adolf.

57 shares on Reddit this month:

I’m not feeling very worky today.

31 shares on Twitch this month:

Printers and computers treat each other like they broke up the night before, and you’re their mutual friend.

Trending Topics 📁

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Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

It was a complicated 17-hour surgery, but they finally managed to separate the art from the artist.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Nobody cleans better than someone who’s pissed off.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I was gonna kiss you under the blood moon eclipse, but whatever, bro.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I have been touched inappropriately by the sun today.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Hey Alexa… remind me why I walked into this room.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I think I can now safely say that none of my co-workers were “personality hires”.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Silently hoping for a comet to strike, to get out of today’s responsibilities.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I love when people start getting filler, and instead of looking younger, it’s just like okay, your face is getting really, really big in all directions.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Internet strangers offer the best advice.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I need a vaccine against overthinking.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,380

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

Hearing my voice in recording makes me wanna apologize to every person I talked to.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

The awkward moment when someone’s zipper is down and you don’t know whether to tell them or not.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

All pants are tear away pants if you’re strong enough.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

Men used to go to war, now they want to be the little spoon.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

I’m not into casual sex. Send me a résumé.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

Sometimes, after I’ve completed a task that wasn’t on my to-do list, I’ll add it and then cross it off for the free dopamine boost.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

The cynicism of those who urge me not to do what I can to help the Nigerian royal family.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

My favorite part of football is when they feed the players water like they’re hamsters.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

You unfollow me because you are afraid of falling in love with me. I know!

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

“Do you like using Twitter?” Does Sisyphus like his boulder?

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Pinterest:

Am I the only person who hates spending the night at someone’s place? Like, we can hang out until 3 a.m., but I’m still going home.

Going bananas on Messenger:

Body: Okay, sleepy time. Brain: Okay, thinky time.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

The world is such a beautiful place when you don’t think too hard about it or look around.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Yes, money alone does not make you happy. It has to be yours too.

Just shared via Facebook:

Don’t argue with her. Just say “you remind me of my ex” then walk away.

Spreading quickly via X:

It’s now socially acceptable again to clap when the plane lands.

Seen just now on Facebook:

I drive safer when there’s food in my passenger’s seat than when there’s a person sitting there.

Making waves on Instagram:

The internal struggle between wanting to be productive and just wanting to nap all day.

Seen just now on YouTube:

You can fake an American accent all you want, but “literally” will expose you.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

The first thing you learn to draw in art school is money from your parents bank account.

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