Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

Imagine not sighing when you think about your life.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

I hope I don’t die of something stupid like old age, I want a piano to fall on my head.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

If you haven’t felt old yet today, try explaining to a teenager how little kids used to sit on a phone book at dinner to be able to reach the table.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

My life advice is always the same. Wait for karma, but take up kickboxing, just in case.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

I’m a strong, independent woman, but like, against my will.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

I hope the babies I was born with at the hospital are doing good.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

My whole life just flashed before my eyes and there was way too much pizza.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

Work beers should be a daily thing.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

Take me back to the night we met so I can never give you a chance.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

I don’t want flying cars, I want the ability to start again from my last save point.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,773

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Pinterest:

If we keep saving daylight, daylight will never learn to save itself.

Spotted on Twitch:

My sleeping pattern isn’t even a pattern anymore. It’s a lifestyle.

Going bananas on TikTok:

The real anti-aging regimen is retaining your childlike wonder and whimsy.

Spotted on YouTube:

Never going into a job interview nervous again, because, wow, it is literally a free invitation to talk about how amazing I am.

Just shared via YouTube:

Life’s all about crossroads and intersections; unfortunately, I’m a bad driver.

Live now on Threads:

I like listening to podcasts because it’s basically getting to enjoy a conversation without having to participate in it.

Live now on Messenger:

The quickest way for a parent to get a child’s attention is to sit down and look comfortable.

Going viral on Messenger:

The main difference between my dog and my kid is my dog responds to her name being called.

Shared recently on Discord:

Welcome to your 50s. You used to be a lot taller.

Seen just now on Slack:

Forrest Gump is a haunting film about how long you have to wait for a bus in America.

Working out consistently yields results, but mannnnnnn…… the laundry.

3 weeks ago

Playful quote about fitness and laundry struggles, highlighting humorous daily priorities.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Workout gains are great until your laundry pile starts lifting heavier than you! 🏋️‍♂️👕🥴

chores, daily, daily routine, exercise, fitness, humor, laundry, motivation, results, routine, working, workout

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Social Media Stars ⭐

100 shares on Facebook this month:

Welcome to Twitter, someone from an unhappy home will attend to you shortly.

23 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Boyfriends sound cool and all, but unfortunately, I enjoy not talking for days at a time.

42 shares on Facebook this month:

Normalize asking if this is an intervention whenever someone invites you over.

45 shares on TikTok this month:

Shutting up is gluten-free. Maybe add that to your diet, princess.

54 shares on YouTube this month:

Had an interview today, and my belly rumbled. The lady goes, “Missed lunch?” I told her, “Nah, I’m hungry for success!”

14 shares on Snapchat this month:

“Who does she think she is?” Well, it appears she is someone living her life unconcerned with who you think she is.

73 shares on Reddit this month:

Home is where you can look ugly and enjoy it.

56 shares on Telegram this month:

Just did my own taxes, I should be in jail by Friday.

14 shares on Facebook this month:

We’ve historically done extremely well with regime change, so this should be a piece of cake.

60 shares on Messenger this month:

They invented the word metallic, because irony was already taken.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

I’m a strong, independent woman, but like, against my will.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

Taylor Swift should write a song about when your sleeves keep rolling down every time you wash the dishes.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

Waiting in the grocery store parking lot for the rotisserie chickens to be ready. The thrill of the hunt.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has viewed:

Voice messages. Just call, goddamnit!

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has viewed:

Is there really anything worse than being forced to watch a video on someone else’s phone and having to pretend to laugh for 2 minutes?

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

Why is everyone looking for intelligent life in space? Can we please start on Earth first?

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

British people be like “I’m Bri ish” cause they drank the “T”

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

Look, ice cream has eggs in it, therefore it is a breakfast food.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

I SAID YES!!!!!! after I asked myself if I wanted a breakfast burrito.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on X:

Imagine being social on social media.

Just landed via Discord:

“You replied so quickly.” God forbid I wait like a dog to hear from you again.

Spotted on Snapchat:

My retirement plan is time travel to the 80s.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I hate starting new relationships. I gotta act like I ain’t crazy for two months.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Can I be 20 again? I know what to do this time.

Going viral on Messenger:

My hair will never allow me to commit any crime; I leave my DNA everywhere.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Wine shopping is 10% grape variety and 90% “ooohh, this one has a pretty label.”

Spotted on Slack:

I recently discovered “movies.” They’re usually like an hour and a half long, and a pretty good way to kill time. Check it out.

Broadcasted on X:

Friendly reminder that someone having a different opinion about a movie than you is a direct attack on you as a person and you should take it very personally.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

“I’d rather hurl myself into an active volcano!” -me, politely declining dates.

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Activity Log ✨

Working out consistently yields results, but mannnnnnn…… the laundry.

Holding this fart in feels like I’m pregnant with a dinosaur.

A Monday every week is excessive.

Staring at your phone is a great way to miss a few years of your life.

Rule number 1 at a concert: Don’t sing while filming!

My yoga instructor was drunk today. Put me in a very awkward position.

Social Media Stars ⭐

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Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Working out consistently yields results, but mannnnnnn…… the laundry.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Holding this fart in feels like I’m pregnant with a dinosaur.

A Monday every week is excessive.

Staring at your phone is a great way to miss a few years of your life.

Rule number 1 at a concert: Don’t sing while filming!

My yoga instructor was drunk today. Put me in a very awkward position.

I’m developing a new fragrance for introverts. It’s called: “Leave me the fuh cologne”.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨