Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"📱💔 Looks like you've mistakenly dialled the hotline for heartbreak instead of happily ever after! Remember, it's better to be single and fabulous than stuck in a textationship with a man who's just not that into you! 😂"

dating, humor, man, relationship, self-awareness, situationship, texting

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

How silly of me to forget that I am the love of my life.

0

2 months ago

am, appreciation, confidence, forget, humor, i, life, love, me, positivity, self, self appreciation, self-love, silly
I had a heated but interesting discussion today and they even agreed with me at the end. That’s exactly why I love talking to myself.

0

2 months ago

agree, conversation, discussion, end, even, exactly, heated, humor, i, interesting, love, me, myself, self, talking, today
Fun fact: The confetti you’ll see in Times Square tonight was made from one CVS receipt.

0

2 months ago

celebration, confetti, CVS, eve, fact, fun, fun fact, humor, new, New Year’s Eve, receipt, square, times, Times Square, tonight, year’s
Somebody somewhere today don’t know it’s their last day with all 10 fingers.

0

2 months ago

day, finger, fingers, humor, know, last, last day, reminder, somebody, somewhere, today, unexpected
Some people get a bit strange as they get older. Not me. I’ve always been like that!

0

2 months ago

age, always, bit, growth, humor, individuality, me, older, people, personality, self-awareness, strange
In honor of the winter solstice, I also will be cold, distant and filled with darkness.

0

2 months ago

celebration, cold, darkness, distant, filled, honor, humor, i, irony, seasonal, solstice, winter, winter solstice

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

80 shares on Pinterest this month:

If I were Juliet, I would NOT be pleased to find a man standing under my balcony at midnight. Sir, I am in my jim-jams.

94 shares on Twitch this month:

Stop avoiding your banking app. Go look at what you’ve done.

74 shares on Discord this month:

I just hit the back arrow on a website, and it took me to a page that said, “Before you leave.” No. I already made the decision.

28 shares on Instagram this month:

Hate when I get halfway there and have to go back for my teeth.

81 shares on Twitch this month:

Thank you all for attending my final rose ceremony. There will be no roses.

61 shares on Telegram this month:

They should invent a person for me and me only.

39 shares on Pinterest this month:

Have an early flight tomorrow, so naturally I’m going to stay up late tonight and be weird in my room.

69 shares on Twitch this month:

Telling my guitar to “stay tuned”.

67 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’ve disappointed better people.

16 shares on Discord this month:

I like my bacon like I like my men, slightly burnt and crispy, and probably killing me slowly.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

I’ve been locked out of Tinder because of “unusual activity”. I must’ve got a match.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

Flies are literally obsessed with flying into a room, then pretending they can’t get out. Grow up.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

Waving at the end of every Zoom call like it’s the 1800s and a big steamship is leaving the harbor.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

What are y’all gonna do when those labubus come to life and start biting y’alls ankles?

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

My toddler asked if we could go to the zoo today, and I said, “I can’t see that happening.” Then she literally left the room and came back with my glasses.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

I really hope my house is haunted and not in need of structural repairs.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

Instead of getting married again, I’m going to find a woman I don’t like and give her a house.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

Much like lasagna, I’m just held together by cheese at this point.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

Hear me out. What if we don’t elect another president, and we all just promise to be really good?

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

Phone addiction got so bad that watching a movie feels productive.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on X:

If a door closes, you can just open it again. That is a door. Doors work like this.

Seen just now on X:

Yes, my date did get up and leave during dinner, but luckily she hadn’t finished her food.

Spotted on Threads:

I’m old enough to remember when the hole in the ozone layer killed us all off.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

“I thought it might be nice to go around the room and have everyone introduce themselves, including a fun fact.” You thought wrong.

Trending via Messenger:

Needlenose in HR says we can’t use nicknames anymore.

Just landed via Facebook:

My girlfriend just had a go at me for not glistening, whatever that is.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Stop eating around the bush or whatever the saying is.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I have my own hand stamper at home so my coworkers will think I went someplace fun the night before.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

“Don’t shoot your gun at the hurricane” the government says. I’ll do my own research, thanks.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Why is the Formula 1 so afraid of rain? Just drive with more caution. That’s what I always do when it rains.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

You are not in a situationship. You are texting a man who doesn’t like you.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

How silly of me to forget that I am the love of my life.

I had a heated but interesting discussion today and they even agreed with me at the end. That’s exactly why I love talking to myself.

Fun fact: The confetti you’ll see in Times Square tonight was made from one CVS receipt.

Somebody somewhere today don’t know it’s their last day with all 10 fingers.

Some people get a bit strange as they get older. Not me. I’ve always been like that!

In honor of the winter solstice, I also will be cold, distant and filled with darkness.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨