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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I talk to myself mostly because I am an excellent listener.
  • Democracy is a fine thing. The bad thing is that the stupid people are allowed to take part.
  • I’ve never been married, but I tell people I’m divorced so they won’t think something is wrong with me.
  • It turns out when someone asks who your favorite child is, you’re supposed to choose from your own. I know that now.
  • I don’t have to take this abuse from you; I’ve got hundreds of people dying to abuse me.
  • I like you because we hate the same people.