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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇲 has shared:

I took a test to see if I have multiple personalities. I scored 100%, 92% and 88%.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

You know you’re really stressed when you start getting on your own nerves.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

I’ve walked the walk, but nowadays I just sit the sit.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

Some days you just feel like a hotel microwave. You’re here, but you don’t have enough power to actually do anything.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

Someone has left me a voicemail. I don’t know what to do. Open the phone app? The contacts? Do I turn on the TV?

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

Don’t worry. You’re exactly where you should be in life. Because you’ve made horrible choices.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

Eating wings is the opposite of flying.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

You can always gauge my mood by the type of animal videos I share: sweet puppy videos or a cat smacking the shit out of someone.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

I can’t sleep good when I know the food is feeling cold in the fridge.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

Warning: This movie contains “Adult Themes” such as interest rates, bad knees, back pain, and excitement about going to bed early.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

787 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,949

Funny Quotes Topics

13,921

Funny Quotes Images

10,949

23 minutes ago

3,441

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Discord:

The worst thing you can do when cleaning your house is “sit down for a minute.”

Just landed via Facebook:

My favorite yoga pose is reaching for the remote control on the far end of the table without falling off the couch.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Your girlfriend needs two hours to get ready. But if you don’t have your shoes on when she’s ready, you’re the problem.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Engagement photo shoots are so funny as a concept. Like girl, we believed you.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

I wish berries were the size of apples. Just imagine for a second.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

They should release the Epstein list right before the Oscars.

Trending via Discord:

If I was in Jaws, instead of wishing for a bigger boat, I probably would have just asked for a smaller shark.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Future generations will never have to live in unprecedented times, because we’re precedenting the Hell out of everything right now.

Making waves on Discord:

Fun fact: The confetti you’ll see in Times Square tonight was made from one CVS receipt.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Sorry I’m late. I was scraping the clearance tag off your Christmas present.

A Jackie Chan fight scene where he’s in an IKEA warehouse and he fights off dudes with furniture pieces, but by the end he’s accidentally assembled it all into a complete Malm bedroom set.

6 months ago

A Jackie Chan fight scene where he’s in an IKEA warehouse and he fights off dudes with furniture pieces, but by the end he’s accidentally assembled it all into a complete Malm bedroom set.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
🤣👊💥 Imagine Jackie Chan turning an IKEA warehouse into the ultimate battleground, dodging attacks with a Billy bookcase and swinging a Lack table like a pro! And after a whirlwind of chaos, he emerges victorious with a fully assembled Malm bedroom set – now that's some next-level flat-pack martial arts mastery! 🛋️🛏️🔧

accidentally, action, action comedy, assembly, bedroom, bedroom set, chan, comedy, complete, end, fight, fight scene, furniture, humor, IKEA, jackie, Jackie Chan, Malm, pieces, scene, set, warehouse, where

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

787 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,949

Funny Quotes Topics

13,921

Funny Quotes Images

10,949

23 minutes ago

3,432

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇸 has copied:

Some people are wise; some are otherwise.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

We should be able take jets and tanks and stuff whenever we want, we paid for them.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

I accidentally bought a pair of nose-cancelling headphones and now my glasses keep falling off.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

At my age, I’m worried about tripping and falling, so I wear a helmet. I’m also worried about looking ridiculous, so I carry a skateboard.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

Should we all just give up and get really into drugs? Wait, this is literally what happened in the 60s. That just clicked for me.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

Ain’t nothing better than knowing you were right when everyone else thought you were crazy.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

Why read the room when you can leave the room?

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

If a vegetarian who eats fish is a pescatarian, is a vegetarian who eats chicken called a poultrygeist?

Someone from 🇹🇬 has downloaded:

My reality check bounced, guess I’ll have to stay insane for the time being.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

You think you’re cool and then you see a video of yourself running.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via LinkedIn:

This place was really tidy yesterday. It’s a shame you missed it.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

My swear jar is filing for an IPO soon.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Seriously? I came out of hibernation for this?

Going viral on Snapchat:

Stop blaming everyone for all your problems. Pick one person you hate and blame them for everything.

Spotted on Reddit:

Do I work hard? No. But do I work smart to compensate. Absolutely not.

Trending via TikTok:

I love my bed so much, what a place.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

If you’re going to walk in my shoes, please also wear my FitBit.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

My signature move is forgetting someone’s name 2 seconds after they tell me.

Spotted on Threads:

I have more photos of food on my phone than I do of my children.

Just shared via Threads:

The most important thing I learned in life, and I can’t stress enough, it doesn’t matter where you went to college. The only thing that matters is that you’re really hot.

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