Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

I’m in favor of sticking an “out of order” sign on some people’s foreheads. As a warning.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has viewed:

Pumpkin spice season comes earlier every year and yet some still deny climate change.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

If I had a dollar for every time I didn’t know what was going on, I’d be like, why am I always getting all this money?

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

The earlier you wake up, the more time you have to think about why you wish you were still asleep in bed.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

When my wife packs for a trip she basically moves out.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

Gonna run this by my two best friends who are as insane as I am.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

I bet the inventor of the cannon would be relieved to know that they’re mostly about t-shirts now.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

Everybody say a little prayer for my husband, he just told me to calm down.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

The main reason I got divorced was cause I got married.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

You should never donate to people that collect money for marathons. They just take your money and run.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,515

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Telegram:

The more I use social media, the more I see why children shouldn’t.

Live now on YouTube:

Clicked on ‘Make a reservation’ on a restaurant’s page, and it opened FaceTime and started calling them. I cannot stress enough how much I do not want that to happen.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Hanging out with your parents as an adult is so interesting, cause it’s like, “Oh, so that’s why I’m like this.”

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I bet the guy who named the sperm whale wasn’t allowed to name things anymore after that.

Spotted on YouTube:

Remember that your face is literally a combination of hundreds of generations of people who fell in love!

Spreading quickly via Discord:

This flight is so long, I don’t know where I’m going anymore. I just live here now. Even the crying baby gave up.

Just landed via Instagram:

I had a marvelous time ruining everything.

Shared recently on TikTok:

The man who invented autocorrect walks into a barn. He orders a bear.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

My card declined at Subway and they started eating the sandwich in front of me.

Going viral on Facebook:

Why do my kids have Veteran’s Day off, they haven’t done shit.

Aliens probably have group chats called Don’t Stop on Earth.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Looks like we're the pit stop nobody asked for 🚀👽😅

alien, aliens, chat, communication, Earth, extraterrestrial, group, group chat, humor, joke, stop

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Twitter is fun. You kinda just talk to yourself and sometimes someone replies.

0

2 months ago

conversation, fun, just, media, reply, self-talk, social, social media, someone, sometimes, talk, Twitter, yourself
The person who invented butter really understood humans.

0

2 months ago

butter, food, humans, humor, invention, person, understanding
Why are so many people going everywhere whenever I have to go anywhere?

0

2 months ago

anywhere, everywhere, frustration, going, humor, i, irony, observation, people, whenever
I hate it when I’m singing a song and the artist gets the words wrong.

0

2 months ago

artist, entertainment, frustration, hate, humor, i, music, relatable, singing, song, words, wrong
I love eating fast food and getting big and fat. It’s amazing.

0

2 months ago

activity, amazing, big, eating, fast, fast food, fat, food, fun, fun activity, getting, humor, i, indulgence, love, overweight, self-deprecating
Everyone’s a gangster until it’s time to pronounce Worcestershire Sauce.

0

2 months ago

food, gangster, humor, irony, pronounce, pronunciation, sauce, time, worcestershire, Worcestershire sauce

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

94 shares on Slack this month:

Hello, my voicemail is currently unavailable. To leave a message please speak slowly and clearly into the nearest toaster.

74 shares on TikTok this month:

Going to bed early is easy, going to sleep early is a whole other set of problems.

26 shares on Instagram this month:

Imagine sex with me. No, not like that, you’re doing it all wrong!

89 shares on Telegram this month:

Taking Adderall before going to lay on the beach so I can focus more on having a good time.

25 shares on Messenger this month:

When they dress up really nice, but all you can think about is the thrill of taking it off.

36 shares on Threads this month:

The worst part of a fender bender is having to get out of your car and meet a new person.

32 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Inside you, there are two wolves. Kevin Costner is dancing with both of them. I don’t know how this works.

84 shares on X this month:

As you get older, it’s amazing how fast bird-watching creeps up on you…

40 shares on Pinterest this month:

Shoulda named my daughter Calculus cause damn she’s complicated.

25 shares on TikTok this month:

Anyone else who tells their pets every time they leave the house that they’ll be back soon?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

I’m still waiting for the day my parents will say, “It’s all fake, we are millionaires, this was just to teach you to be humble”.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

“You have reached your monthly article limit,” – a website you’ve never accessed before today.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

Hey boy, are you my washing machine? Because neither of you know how long 10 minutes last.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

Teens be like, “I wanted to do that until you asked me to.”

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

I love when I get an email from a brand saying “we miss you!” with no coupon attached. Babe, a lot of people miss me, let’s be competitive here.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

Old enough to know better. Young enough to do it anyway.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

After 25, you’re pretty much 30.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

Sorry I didn’t text you back, I was pretending I didn’t see it and ended up actually forgetting.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

If you’re out shopping today, be nice to retail workers. It’s not their fault you waited until Marys waters broke before you started your shopping.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

I need someone to look at me the way I look at memes.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

April Fool’s next week and still no one has asked me to be their fool.

Live now on Twitch:

I like my bed more than I like most people.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I have some cake and now I’m eating it too. Not seeing the problem here.

Spotted on Twitch:

I don’t understand, “kill them with kindness”; can I use a lightsaber instead?

Live now on TikTok:

My boss was like, “People working from home are just pretending to work,” and it’s like, dude, what do you think I’m doing in the office?

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I accidentally bought a pair of nose-cancelling headphones and now my glasses keep falling off.

Making waves on Reddit:

Me drinking green tea: this is going to fix everything.

Making waves on Twitch:

Please go out, have fun, have friends, make connections. That mysterious lifestyle won’t save you.

Trending via YouTube:

Sorry for acting weird. It’s just that I mirror people, and you were being weird first.

Just shared via Instagram:

Sorry I’m late. I was in the car waiting for my song to end.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Aliens probably have group chats called Don’t Stop on Earth.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Twitter is fun. You kinda just talk to yourself and sometimes someone replies.

The person who invented butter really understood humans.

Why are so many people going everywhere whenever I have to go anywhere?

I hate it when I’m singing a song and the artist gets the words wrong.

I love eating fast food and getting big and fat. It’s amazing.

Everyone’s a gangster until it’s time to pronounce Worcestershire Sauce.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨