Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Looks like the kids' toothpaste is holding a daily meeting with the entire bathroom crew! 🚽🪞🧼 Maybe they're discussing their plan for world domination, one minty fresh smile at a time! 😄🦷"

bathroom, ceiling, daily, daily life, floor, household, humor, kids, life, me, mirror, parenting, sink, toothpaste, towel, towels, walls

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The secret ingredient to being really funny is childhood trauma.

0

2 months ago

being, childhood, comedy, experience, humor, ingredient, laughter, personal, personal experience, secret, secret ingredient, trauma
At 30+, I’m like an old phone battery. Even when you charge me overnight for 10 hours, by midday I’m at 60%.

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2 months ago

30, 30s, age, battery, charge, energy, even, exhaustion, hours, humor, me, midday, old, phone
My laundry is done, but I don’t even want it anymore. The washing machine can keep it.

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3 months ago

chores, done, even, humor, i, keep, laundry, laziness, machine, procrastination, want, washing, washing machine
My weight loss journey is just the three hours in between meals.

0

3 months ago

diet, eating, hours, humor, journey, just, loss, meal, meals, three, time, weight, weight loss
Don’t buy roses for her, buy chicken nuggets. Show her you really care.

0

2 months ago

care, chicken, chicken nugget, chicken nuggets, date, food, gift, humor, love, nugget, relationship, rose, show
Stay humble, you are someone’s weird coworker.

0

2 months ago

coworker, humble, humor, identity, modesty, self-awareness, stay, weird, workplace, workplace humor

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

14 shares on Threads this month:

My pronouns are she/her and my adjectives are problematic/overwhelmed.

96 shares on YouTube this month:

I hate when the iPhone corrects ‘Omw’ to ‘On my way!’. Man, I am not that excited.

85 shares on WeChat this month:

Don’t you hate it when you offer help and the other person says yes?

72 shares on WeChat this month:

Don’t feel bad if you don’t succeed on your first try. It took Michael Angelo sixteen chapels.

77 shares on Pinterest this month:

May the Force be with you… especially in Monday meetings.

58 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’m not lazy, I’m on power saving mode.

70 shares on Pinterest this month:

The first person to see a peacock spread his tail probably had a heart attack.

35 shares on LinkedIn this month:

A freshly cleaned bathroom triggers an irresistible urge in men to trim their beard.

26 shares on TikTok this month:

People in their late 20s and early 30s are like “this is my emotional support trip to Japan.”

43 shares on Twitch this month:

It should be illegal to take a nap and still have a headache when you wake up. Like, I shut it off and back on again, why are you still here?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

I’d change my name to laundry if it meant you’d think about doing me every day.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

I’m slowly becoming an adult. Please make it stop.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

I hate lying to my parents but it’s for their own good.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

Once you are able to find humor in any situation, you’ve either reached enlightenment or you’re just a little unhinged.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has shared:

Me gasping and flipping off the vultures as they circle above the running track.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

I love rap beefs, it’s so romantic when two guys sing songs to each other.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

The only way I’m gonna hit the gym is if I accidentally drive into it.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

My lotion bottle says to use it on areas of irritation, so I slathered it all over my coworker, Deborah.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has downloaded:

Handing the bus driver a $50 bill and telling him “Just drive”.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has copied:

Sorry, Mom, I can’t go outside, I’m ugly.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Facebook:

First you’re cringe, then you’re the blueprint.

Making waves on Threads:

Slowly descending into madness. Anyone want anything?

Trending via Instagram:

Learning to be Alpha from YouTube.

Just shared via Snapchat:

The older I get, the more I love my morning coffee and no one speaking to me.

Making waves on Twitch:

Humanity doesn’t deserve a new year, look at the mess they made of the last one.

Seen just now on X:

During winter, it’s either lazy starvation or eight thousand calories in one sitting.

Seen just now on Threads:

Getting a girlfriend is actually very easy, you just have to spin a basketball on your finger.

Shared recently on Discord:

I dreamed I won the lottery, so you can imagine how thrilled I was to wake up and get ready for work.

Just shared via Reddit:

Have you ever just restarted the dryer because you didn’t feel like folding the clothes yet?

Shared recently on TikTok:

All of my problems boil down to me being bad at being alive.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Are you there, bathroom walls, ceiling, floor, mirror, sink, and towels? It’s me, the kids toothpaste.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

The secret ingredient to being really funny is childhood trauma.

At 30+, I’m like an old phone battery. Even when you charge me overnight for 10 hours, by midday I’m at 60%.

My laundry is done, but I don’t even want it anymore. The washing machine can keep it.

My weight loss journey is just the three hours in between meals.

Don’t buy roses for her, buy chicken nuggets. Show her you really care.

Stay humble, you are someone’s weird coworker.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨