Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • My toxic trait is that I give my friends mental health advice when I belong in an asylum.
  • Apparently I lack empathy, according to some stupid cow in HR.
  • I’d be less aggressive in the morning if I could drive to work in a tank.
  • And is your “sparkling personality” in the room with us now?
  • I like how the Tooth Fairy got the job, and then subbed it out to everyone’s parents. That’s called “business savvy.”
  • I never feel more alone than when I’m trying to put sunscreen on my back.