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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

Don’t rub your happiness in people’s faces this Valentine’s Day. Let the couples enjoy themselves for once.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

Dear Math, I don’t want to solve your problem, I have my own problems to solve.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

Am I just an Untitled Document to you?

Someone from 🇱🇹 has copied:

Offering friendship as a consolation prize for a failed romantic connection attempt is absolutely cruel.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

The more stupid the views, the harder it is to talk people out of them.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

There has been a British voice in my head saying, “Bit sad innit,” for the past few weeks.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has downloaded:

I finally figured out my lifelong dream of becoming a human blanket, but my friends still call it napping on their couch.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

My therapist is fluffy and walks on four paws.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

I’m gonna start cursing people out but with biblical phrases like I hope your crops wither and bear no fruit and the ravens eat your mustard seeds.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has copied:

Men be like, “But I’m different.” Yeah, a different type of disappointment.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,588

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Remember when movies felt real, and foreheads could wrinkle.

Going bananas on Messenger:

I don’t need your flipping advice, I am capable of ruining my life on my own.

Live now on Facebook:

Nothing makes me more stabby than when my husband ignores me and starts talking to the dog.

Just shared via Facebook:

Job market so bad, I started following my dreams.

Trending via Threads:

“Yeah no” is my favorite combo.

Going viral on X:

The feminine urge to act clueless while knowing everything.

Just shared via Discord:

I dreamt this night that I had died and when I woke up, a piece of me was actually already stiff.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

The guy in the stall beside doesn’t know he can shut off his camera shutter.

Spotted on Messenger:

At this point, Tom Cruise is a stuntman who does his own acting.

Going viral on YouTube:

Not to brag, but my best yoga pose is awkward facing dog.

Being single only sucks when you’re a little drunk and really want to flirt.

3 weeks ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When you're tipsy and ready to mingle but your only date is a bowl of chips 🍟😂#PartyOfOne

being, dating, drunk, flirt, little, nightlife, only, relationship, single, sucks, want

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The first Saw movie should have been called Footloose.

0

2 months ago

film, film title, Footloose, humor, joke, movie, pun, saw, should, title, wordplay
I’m not deleting my Twitter, I was here before Elon.

0

2 months ago

before, deleting, Elon, here, humor, i, internet, loyalty, media, nostalgia, opinion, social, social media, statement, Twitter
Living with a dog is 90% following each other around, watching each other go potty, and wondering what the other has in their mouth.

0

2 months ago

90, animal, animal behavior, around, behavior, companionship, daily, daily life, dog, following, humor, life, living, living with pet, mouth, owner, pet, pet owner, watching, wondering
Maybe I’ll quit so I can focus on summer.

0

2 months ago

focus, fun, humor, i, quit, summer, vacation
Can it still be an emotional support animal if the animal doesn’t want to participate? Asking for my cat.

0

2 months ago

animal, asking, cat, emotional, emotional support, humor, participation, still, support, want
Game night with the family is only fun until I lose.

0

2 months ago

board, board games, competition, family, fun, game, game night, games, humor, i, lose, night, only, playful, rivalry, sibling, sibling rivalry

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

90 shares on WeChat this month:

I always need to pee, but it’s just because my heart is so big it pushes on my bladder.

31 shares on Slack this month:

Tattoo idea for men: spider webs in the corners of the receding hairline.

87 shares on Twitch this month:

If you’re ever wondering what to do in an uncomfortable situation, just think “What would teenage me do?” And then do the opposite of that.

48 shares on YouTube this month:

How do you react when you see someone you respect on an e-scooter?

74 shares on Threads this month:

When you’re dead, you don’t know that you’re dead. But it’s hard for those around you. It’s the same when you’re stupid.

66 shares on Pinterest this month:

Today sucked so bad, I had to stop by the liquor store on my way to the bar.

75 shares on Reddit this month:

The meteorologist who devised the wind chill factor has died. He was 86, but he felt like 75.

37 shares on Messenger this month:

Therapists are like, “You don’t owe anyone anything. Except me. You owe me 250 dollars for this session.”

58 shares on X this month:

Walking into someone’s house with healthy, thriving houseplants everywhere: “Oh, I see you dabble in witchcraft!”

61 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I can’t believe Halloween was 10 pounds ago.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

Funny that the Three Wise Men brought probably the three worst presents for a newborn baby.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

People who live in glass houses should install frosted glass around the toilet part.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

Shazam-ing a song in public feels the same as taking out a big hammer and bonking yourself on the head.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

Some of you are out here driving like your turn signal’s free trial ended and you’re all out of blinks.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

Asking people their favorite color and then calling them liars.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

My first mistake was leaving the womb.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has downloaded:

Hey boy, are you my period? Because you’re annoying as hell but I still wanna see you regularly.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

Nothing more humbling than being at a karaoke birthday party with a bunch of singers.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

The way I see it, eating chips while I wait for my pizza to arrive is no different than ordering a starter in a restaurant.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

She’s got style, she’s got grace, she crams french fries in her face.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Pinterest:

There are too many neglected emojis.

Trending via Reddit:

The umbrella was going to be called brella, but the inventor hesitated.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Porn actresses envy the look on my face when I clean my ear with a cotton bud.

Spreading quickly via X:

Everyone has their talents. Mine is picking the checkout line filled with people who apparently have never gone through a checkout line before in their life.

Live now on WhatsApp:

“Bluetooth or Insane?” is a fun game we all play when we see a lone person speaking out loud in public.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

You should be allowed to miss work if you’re not feeling sexy.

Trending via Snapchat:

Lowkey terrifying when someone attractive is actually into you, omg.

Making waves on X:

Is Mercury in reggaeton?

Trending via YouTube:

“Please feel free to ignore this email!” Way ahead of you, buddy.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I think if you ask Kanye for a million at the right time, he’ll give it to you.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Being single only sucks when you’re a little drunk and really want to flirt.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

The first Saw movie should have been called Footloose.

I’m not deleting my Twitter, I was here before Elon.

Living with a dog is 90% following each other around, watching each other go potty, and wondering what the other has in their mouth.

Maybe I’ll quit so I can focus on summer.

Can it still be an emotional support animal if the animal doesn’t want to participate? Asking for my cat.

Game night with the family is only fun until I lose.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨