Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

At this point, I’m sure I’ll meet an alien or zombies before I meet the love of my life!

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

Nothing says entitlement like a goose family crossing the road.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

I’m in a long-distance relationship with the stars.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

Every time I do something stupid, my dad stares at my mom like he wants a refund.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

When people say I don’t mean to brag, they’re bragging about not bragging.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

This could have been an email. Me, while attending a wedding ceremony.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

I used to think the cat was dumb for staring out the window, waiting for birds, but I’d probably stare too, if occasionally a pizza flew by.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

Garlic and bread is the only marriage I truly have faith in.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

Whenever Im in trouble, I think, what would Jesus do? Then I pretend to be dead and disappear for 3 days.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

I like my money where I can see it: hanging in my closet.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,642

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Twitch:

My hobbies include using the TV as background noise while I scroll on my phone.

Trending via Facebook:

Sports bars exist. There should be bars for monitoring the situation.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

That moment when rappers mispronounce a word just to make it rhyme.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

If only guys would moan in bed like they do in the gym…

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Why call it a “step dad” when you could have called it a faux pas?

Just landed via WhatsApp:

This tape doesn’t even taste like scotch.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

A gender-neutral equivalent of ‘sugar daddy’ is glucose guardian.

Spotted on X:

Whoever named them fitting rooms has a lot of nerve.

Making waves on Messenger:

I did nothing wrong. I tried to do nothing and did it wrong.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I hope my parents feel proud. They scared me so bad about getting pregnant as a teenager that now they’re never getting grandkids.

Chill, folks, it’s just a simulation.

5 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Guess it's time to find the cheat codes for unlimited snacks and naps! 🎮🍕😴

calm, chill, folks, humor, joke, just, reality, simulation, virtual, virtual reality

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I actually think my version of the lyrics makes more sense.

0

2 months ago

actually, humor, i, lyrics, opinion, sense, think, version
If consuming too much caffeine causes short-term memory loss, just imagine what consuming too much caffeine can do.

0

3 weeks ago

addiction, caffeine, coffee, humor, imagine, just, loss, memory, much, short-term, short-term memory loss, too
Parent hack: Shut your child’s bedroom door to make your house cleaner.

0

2 months ago

bedroom, child, cleaner, cleanliness, door, hack, house, humor, parent, parenting, shut
They should invent a DoorDash but for a kiss goodnight and getting tucked in.

0

3 months ago

affection, bedtime, comfort, delivery, DoorDash, getting, goodnight, humor, invent, kiss, kiss goodnight, relationship, should, tuck, tuck in
Wanna come over and see my mis-matched sock collection?

0

2 months ago

activity, collection, fun, fun activity, humor, mis-match, over, quirky, sock, visit
One day we will tell our grandkids how far we had to scroll to get to the recipe.

0

2 months ago

cooking, day, family, grandkids, humor, internet, nostalgia, recipe, scroll, technology, tell

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

35 shares on Messenger this month:

I think you are suffering from a lack of vitamin ME.

62 shares on Discord this month:

Love when people summon Grok and there’s no reply. He just doesn’t care sometimes.

17 shares on X this month:

How many filters does it take before it’s technically a painting?

45 shares on Reddit this month:

Sometimes I’ll pause a YouTube video to scroll on reels. I’m not sure if I’ll ever be able to be loved genuinely.

34 shares on Slack this month:

ROMO (relief of missing out)

12 shares on Messenger this month:

If you burned CDs for the car so your original copies wouldn’t get scratched, it’s time to schedule your colonoscopy.

37 shares on Telegram this month:

Christmas lights: the only thing bright around here besides my personality.

24 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Starting an OnlyFans, but it’s just videos of me trying to use chopsticks.

87 shares on Reddit this month:

I just think we should kiss. And kiss and kiss and kiss and kiss and kiss. But that’s just me.

18 shares on TikTok this month:

This too shall pass, but what the hell?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

I only go for nature walks with people I can outrun.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has copied:

I was about to organise my closet, but I then I found what I was looking for.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

Ah, the magical land of Monday—the gift that keeps not giving!

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

My parents still haven’t apologized for making me ugly.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has shared:

Drilling for oil is well boring.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

AI is that friend who is always there for you but gives terrible advice.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has shared:

Sledding is the best! (until you have to walk back up the hill)

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

A good substitute for love and and personal fulfillment is a big bowl of fries.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

Your opinions are not my business.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

A 20% discount sounds great until you realize you can’t afford the other 80%

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on YouTube:

All the stops on the bus are pointless, except the one I’m getting off at.

Breaking via Threads:

The fake cough I use when calling in sick is now available on iTunes.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Is there anyone here old enough to remember when typing was a class in high school?

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I prefer my weighted blanket in human form.

Just shared via Discord:

The funniest thing about Batman is that he legitimately doesn’t give a shit about crime that happens during the day.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Unfortunately for the haters, I will continue to keep being me.

Trending via YouTube:

The gothic urge to live in a sleepy seaside town with a terrifying backstory.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

I appreciate all clouds. Fluffy, non-fluffy… it’s how Bob Ross would’ve wanted it.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Sunsets and women are undoubtedly God’s best creations.

Trending via Telegram:

I love eating fast food and getting big and fat. It’s amazing.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Chill, folks, it’s just a simulation.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I actually think my version of the lyrics makes more sense.

If consuming too much caffeine causes short-term memory loss, just imagine what consuming too much caffeine can do.

Parent hack: Shut your child’s bedroom door to make your house cleaner.

They should invent a DoorDash but for a kiss goodnight and getting tucked in.

Wanna come over and see my mis-matched sock collection?

One day we will tell our grandkids how far we had to scroll to get to the recipe.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨