Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • The key to a healthy relationship is taking turns being the sad one.
  • God, on inventing the tiger: “Okay, so this is going to be some kind of cat that likes to eat Frosted Flakes.”
  • There’s nothing worse than being in public and you touch something that shouldn’t be sticky and it is.
  • I bought some old lady reading glasses as a lark, a laugh, and now my eyes don’t hurt. This isn’t what I wanted.
  • If God had known what mankind would turn into, he would have sterilized Adam.
  • Ever think vampires just lied about hating garlic, now we’re just out here seasoning ourselves for them?