Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

Stop asking people over 40 what we like to do for fun. You’re not gonna like the answer.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

I’m convinced the washing machine is a portal to another dimension for socks.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

Cleaning your glasses is like changing from 360p to 1080p.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

The French only eat snails because they don’t like fast food.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

I’m that person who will restart a song because I got distracted and wasn’t appreciating it enough.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

Putting your wedding scrapbook in the little free library is an unprecedented level of divorced.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

Adulting in 3 words: it’s always something.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has downloaded:

Does anyone know where I can get my shit together?

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

If my neighbors keep fighting like this, I might need to cancel some of my streaming services.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

Welcome to your 50s… A new pain will be be assigned to you shortly.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

240 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,509

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,509

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,476

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Messenger:

There should be a tented fingers emoji. For when you’re feeling ruminative.

Shared recently on Facebook:

We can do things two ways. My way or the right way.

Just landed via Pinterest:

In your twenties, there may be love. It’s very important to ignore this love and pursue a master’s instead.

Making waves on Messenger:

As long as I can dip something in something, I’m happy.

Going bananas on Telegram:

Being complimented by a girl in public is like getting kissed by an angel.

Going viral on YouTube:

Christmas can be really hard for single people. Everyone else is having a brilliant time and we have to hide the fact that every day is like that for us.

Just landed via Instagram:

I feel like a credit card, cause I’m constantly being used irresponsibly.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Note to self: No more bitching about ugly furniture with people at IKEA whose home you haven’t been to yet.

Making waves on Telegram:

How do I tell someone respectfully to die in a fire?

Don’t really want to have 6-8 pints and a takeaway tonight, but it’s Friday and rules are rules.

3 days ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Looks like Friday compliance is mandatory! 🍻🍕 #RulesAreRules

drinking, food, Friday, humor, indulgence, pint, rule, rules, takeaway, tonight, want, weekend

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

When I learned the word “literally,” that was the beginning of the end.

0

4 months ago

beginning, end, expression, humor, i, irony, language, learned, learning, literally, word
Bottle of Worcestershire sauce tipped over in my fridge. The mess is unpronounceable.

0

2 months ago

bottle, disaster, fridge, fridge spill, frustration, humorous, humorous frustration, kitchen, kitchen disaster, kitchen mess, mess, over, sauce, spill, unpronounceable, worcestershire, Worcestershire sauce
My plan is to die young as late as possible.

0

2 months ago

dark, dark humor, death, die, humor, humor statement, late, life, longevity, philosophy, plan, statement, wit, young
Today, I noticed that the cover of my ironing board was wrinkled, and I laughed at the irony. Then I laughed again because of the word “irony.”

0

2 months ago

again, amusing, amusing moment, board, cover, everyday, everyday life, household, humor, i, irony, irony joke, joke, laughter, life, moment, noticed, today, word
Not to brag but I always pick the slowest moving checkout line at the grocery store.

0

2 months ago

always, brag, checkout, checkout line, funny observation, grocery, grocery store, humor, i, line, moving, observation, pick, shopping, slow, store
A fun thing to do on a first date is wear a wedding dress.

0

2 months ago

activity, comedy, date, dress, first date, fun, fun activity, humor, relationship, thing, wear, wedding, wedding dress

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

54 shares on Twitch this month:

Sex is great, but have you ever started slowly picking up speed after sitting in a traffic jam?

55 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m not athletic, but I’m good at jumping to conclusions.

20 shares on TikTok this month:

Not to brag, but I drove and found a place I was looking for without turning down my music today.

33 shares on Messenger this month:

Since I tolerate gluten and lactose well, I can afford a few intolerances in the interpersonal area.

66 shares on TikTok this month:

I stay up late every night, regret it in the morning, and the next day I do it all over again.

14 shares on YouTube this month:

Of course I wrote a grocery list. I carefully wrote it all down and then didn’t bring it with me, like my mother and her mother before her.

28 shares on Reddit this month:

Shoutout to coughing on the bus. Haven’t tried it myself but seems really popular.

61 shares on Snapchat this month:

Don’t forget to overestimate your importance today.

77 shares on YouTube this month:

Letting the sun have its way with my freckles today.

52 shares on Threads this month:

Sorry, I missed your call. I watched it ring and everything.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

Lord, please take this gas out of my stomach and put it in my car.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

I hate listening to a rapper that I used to adore, and they just don’t have it anymore.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

I have some cake and now I’m eating it too. Not seeing the problem here.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

My mental health is as reliable as a flashlight in a horror film.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

Saying “You’re tearing this family apart” whenever someone argues with me.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

My boss told me “It’s not rocket science.” Yeah, almost everything that exists is not rocket science.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

Being able to tolerate the sound of your own voice in a video is probably the highest form of self-acceptance.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

My DMs are always open if you want to talk to yourself.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

(To my coworker that’s a year younger than me) You’re like a son to me.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

Pinterest recipe so long that it’s now a limited series on Netflix.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I don’t understand why “family-run” should be a sign of quality. North Korea, for example, is also family-run and doesn’t convince me at all.

Just landed via Pinterest:

My birthday wish is for everyone to ignore my birthday.

Breaking via Slack:

I want to make you say, “Oh God,” in a way that makes God nervous.

Spotted on TikTok:

If caterpillars are able to sleep for a long time and come out prettier, why cant I?

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Weirdos gonna weird.

Spotted on Threads:

I welcome change as long as nothing is altered or different than before.

Freshly posted on Slack:

When people don’t drink coffee, it’s like, okay, but how do you solve the problem of being awake?

Just shared via Facebook:

Spongebob wouldn’t even mess with some of y’all. But he’d hang out with me because my heart is pure, and I like to laugh a lot.

Spotted on Messenger:

Due to financial reasons, I will now be performing photosynthesis.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Don’t really want to have 6-8 pints and a takeaway tonight, but it’s Friday and rules are rules.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

When I learned the word “literally,” that was the beginning of the end.

Bottle of Worcestershire sauce tipped over in my fridge. The mess is unpronounceable.

My plan is to die young as late as possible.

Today, I noticed that the cover of my ironing board was wrinkled, and I laughed at the irony. Then I laughed again because of the word “irony.”

Not to brag but I always pick the slowest moving checkout line at the grocery store.

A fun thing to do on a first date is wear a wedding dress.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨