Ever since I was a little girl I knew I wanted to leave work early.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

The Slow and the Furious: me navigating a shopping cart through a grocery store filled with morons.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

The best proof that fairy tales are fictional is the fact that the prince is always an intelligent and handsome single man.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

Having hoes in different area codes sounds really exhausting.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

My phone went from fully charged to 10% while I was sleeping, so I guess it leads a more exciting nightlife than I do.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

Robot bartender rips me in half after listening to my problems for over an hour.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

There should be a Mad Max movie that reveals the world outside Australia has actually remained pretty normal.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

Many greetings from my coffee. Y’all are talking too much again.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

I like when I walk with people and they note that I’m a fast walker. We’re in a race. We’re in a race and you’re losing actually.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

I like my Jims slim and my chances fat.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

That moment when a zombie out for brains walks past you.