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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

The person opposite me has a donut. I do not have a donut. That should be my donut. This person is now my arch nemesis.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

Easiest way to ragebait a finance bro is to start the ‘why can’t we print more money’ conversation.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

I watch “Law and Order” so much that when I turn off the TV, I wipe my fingerprints off the remote.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

Bears and worms have almost nothing in common. But gummy bears and gummy worms? Very similar.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

Next to nothing is a weird place.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has viewed:

Men love to show you a YouTube video. It is a sign of deep respect in their culture.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

Driving home, listening to Gangsta’s Paradise, with my hands at 10 and 2.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

Pleasantly surprised to discover the treadmill I bought came with a remote control, so I can run it from my recliner.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

Am I just getting old or are people getting more annoying?

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

I wonder if BBQ thinks about me too.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Dec 31, 2025

3,372

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Twitch:

Guess I’ll be getting the same thing for Christmas, again. Fat!

Shared recently on Telegram:

College core: you sit in the class for attendance, then go home and teach yourself.

Just shared via Messenger:

Our parents are going to be shocked when they find out that most of us are serious about not getting married.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Yesterday my husband thought he saw a cockroach in the kitchen. He sprayed and cleaned everything thoroughly. Today I’m putting the cockroach in the bathroom.

Going viral on YouTube:

So, Earth is basically auditions for heaven and hell.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

In the morning: Tired! At lunchtime: Tired! In the evening: Tired! In bed: “Everybody dance now!”

Just landed via X:

Dating outside of your education bracket leads to misunderstandings and arguments.

Just landed via X:

Every single bad day happened because I woke up.

Just shared via WeChat:

Me leaving the house: I hope I don’t see anyone.

Seen just now on X:

I would only enjoy the Met Gala if at the end of that runway they all walked into a volcano.

Forget pheromones, barbecue smells are always attractive.

2 months ago

0

Forget pheromones, barbecue smells are always attractive.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Who needs pheromones when the irresistible aroma of barbecue is wafting through the air, beckoning us all like a sizzling siren song 🍖🔥 Whether you're drawn in by the smoky allure of ribs on the grill or the tantalizing scent of burgers charbroiling, one thing's for sure – BBQ always knows how to flirt with our senses! 😋 #GrillAndChill

always, attractive, barbecue, cooking, dating, food, forget, humor, pheromones, scent, smells

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I remixed a remix, it was back to normal.

0

2 months ago

back, creativity, humor, i, music, normal, remix
I don’t understand why people have to “get ready for bed.” I am always ready for bed.

0

2 months ago

always, am, bed, bedtime, humor, i, laziness, people, readiness, ready, sarcasm, sleep, understand, why
Driving home, listening to Gangsta’s Paradise, with my hands at 10 and 2.

0

5 months ago

2, car, driving, gangsta’s, Gangsta’s Paradise, hand, hand position, hands, home, humor, listening, music, nostalgia, paradise, position, road, road safety, safety, song
The problem is I am always the problem.

0

2 months ago

always, am, humor, i, introspection, irony, problem, self-awareness, self-deprecating
Don’t forget to look directly into the sun for at least 10 minutes per day because that’s where all the vitamins are.

0

2 months ago

advice, day, forget, health, humor, irony, least, minutes, sarcasm, sun, vitamins, where
My back hurts too much to lean over anymore, going to have to resort to picking things up with a deep curtsy.

0

2 months ago

back, back pain, comedy, curtsy, deep, deep curtsy, going, humor, lean, leaning, leaning over, over, pain, physical, physical comedy, picking, picking up, things

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

28 shares on X this month:

Thinking the bodega owner likes you is exactly the same as thinking the stripper likes you.

33 shares on YouTube this month:

Everybody is fighting a battle that you don’t know about, because of the first rule of Fight Club.

33 shares on Instagram this month:

The Bible is 100% accurate. Especially when thrown at close range.

95 shares on Snapchat this month:

I will not accept a hint. I will act dumb until you say it clearly to me.

90 shares on Instagram this month:

Of course, being a child is terrible. They don’t give you any money, and then make you watch commercials the whole time.

24 shares on Messenger this month:

People just don’t build cities on rock and roll anymore.

48 shares on Twitch this month:

Surely, this is the hangover that will teach me my lesson.

21 shares on X this month:

3 friends is enough. 1 for the movie theater, 1 for drinks and apps, 1 for texting concerning mental health information.

20 shares on WeChat this month:

I don’t trust anyone who gets enraged over messed-up fast food orders.

59 shares on Instagram this month:

“We told you to stop at 2012!” – The Mayans

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Women love it when you approach them on the street and say “whoa, is there a hot babe convention in town?”

5 folks are currently checking 👀

That urge to nap between 3pm – 5pm is no joke.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I suck at flirting. I’ll be like “is that so?”

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Despite popular opinion, dating apps are NOT for dating. They are for finding people to watch your Instagram story for years and years.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

The sexiest thing a man can do is have a problem-solving mentality.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I was about to organise my closet, but I then I found what I was looking for.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

You have one week to ask me to be your Valentine. Requests must be in the form of poetic verse written in your blood.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I tried a onesome before, but I started catching feelings.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Have you ever met someone and thought that you couldn’t wait to spend the rest of your life without them?

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I march to the beat of my own dumb.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,292

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

The older I get, the more I treat birthdays like one-night stands and just pretend they didn’t happen.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

If at first you don’t succeed, that’s so embarrassing. Why are you so bad at this?

Someone from 🇳🇬 has copied:

It was me, I let the dogs out.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

Being on a diet isn’t so bad if you don’t follow it.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

People who work in customer service should be allowed to fight one customer a day. Two on Fridays.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

Seems like being an asshole is a full-time job for some.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

Am simultaneously the family’s black sheep and gold star, and that’s exactly why I’m the way I am.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

Once married, the woman takes over the entire closet and the man stores everything he owns in his left cargo pocket.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has viewed:

Every Sunday is superbowel if you eat enough chili.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

I had the most impatient and rudest cashier. I’m never using self-checkout again.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Cats love to wake you up and go back to sleep. It’s part of their culture.

Making waves on Twitch:

Never underestimate my ability to effortlessly make something more difficult than it needs to be.

Making waves on Telegram:

I only attract psychopaths. If you’ve ever had a crush on me, find a therapist.

Seen just now on Slack:

“You’re an athlete,” I whisper to myself, as I begin my third attempt to get out of the couch.

Just landed via Telegram:

The older I get, the more I hate making extra stops after work. I drive home like I’m late for the house.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

A lot of people think you need a lot of money to buy clothes. And they’re right.

Going viral on Slack:

You amuse me, Jester. You may enter my bed chambers.

Trending via Twitch:

Congratulations to the people who never took their Christmas decorations down. You’re almost there.

Just landed via Facebook:

If you accuse me of yelling, you will start to hear yelling so you can note the difference in the future.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Just because the deodorant says 48 hrs, it does not mean you have to challenge it.

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