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Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

Twitter is the only place you argue with CEOs and heads of states while sleeping in the kitchen.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

Tech enthusiasts: My entire house is smart. Tech workers: The only piece of technology in my house is a printer, and I keep a gun next to it so I can shoot it if it makes a noise I don’t recognize.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

Teens are like, “My homework isn’t done, but check out this presentation I made on why I need Instagram.”

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

I get ignored so much, my name should be “terms and conditions”.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

My robot vacuum and I are cut from the same cloth. When we see a line of dirt on the kitchen floor, we just spin around and go the other way.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

I think I just hit a Labubu with my car.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has downloaded:

Boxes of pasta don’t need a plastic window. I believe pasta is in the box.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

Sorry, I can’t come over tonight. I’ve become too invested in these fictional characters and whether or not they will kiss.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

When is a robot gonna take over my job? Please?

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

I’m sorry you had a bad experience at our restaurant. To make it up to you, here is a coupon for more of our terrible, terrible food.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

3,912

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on WeChat:

The umbrella was going to be called brella, but the inventor hesitated.

Making waves on WeChat:

Going from summer clothes to winter clothes: “Okay!” Going from winter clothes to summer clothes: “I AM NOT READY!”

Just shared via Reddit:

I miss when my hardest decision was Nickelodeon or Cartoon Network.

Spotted on Discord:

I’ve been reading the room for 20 minutes. It’s not looking so good.

Breaking via Messenger:

One thing no one mentions about being an adult is how much time you debate with yourself over keeping a cardboard box because it’s a really good box.

Broadcasted on X:

I love how women can go from obsessed to not interested at all when a man makes that one wrong move.

Making waves on Instagram:

Just did several sets of some bullshit at the gym… no idea which muscles have been targeted.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Pumpkin spice season comes earlier every year and yet some still deny climate change.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Took the road less travelled after buying the sat nav less expensive.

Going bananas on WeChat:

If I’m too much, go find less. I’m not running a clearance sale.

Home » Funny Christmas Cd Quotes

Funny Christmas CD quotes

New funny Christmas CD quotes 👇

Took my car to the mechanic because it was making a terrible noise. He removed the Mariah Carey Christmas CD, and now it’s fine.

2

6 hours ago

car, car repair, carey, cd, Christmas, Christmas CD, fine, holiday, holiday music, making, mariah, Mariah Carey, mechanic, music, noise, repair, terrible

All funny Christmas CD quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

39 shares on Snapchat this month:

I don’t wanna party like it’s 1999, I want to pay my bills like it’s 1999.

16 shares on Threads this month:

“Communism sounds good in theory, but doesn’t work in practice.” Capitalism doesn’t even sound good in theory.

72 shares on WeChat this month:

Every time I stand up, my dog gets excited as hell. He understands that I’m a real man who can make shit happen at any given moment.

97 shares on Instagram this month:

No one is more surprised than my kids every night when I say it’s bed time.

34 shares on Messenger this month:

Mirror, mirror on the wall, why so many fingerprints?

10 shares on WeChat this month:

They hooked up tubes and sensors, but the doctor still can’t figure out why my kisses are so sweet. They want to hold me overnight and “never let go.”

82 shares on Slack this month:

I am cassette tape years old.

45 shares on WeChat this month:

Oh, how much I love a Sunday when you don’t have to work the next day.

63 shares on Discord this month:

Imagine trying to ruin my day and I ignore you for the rest of my life.

87 shares on Discord this month:

You can talk about any topic for 30 mins if you’re a confident liar.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

At the age where a big break could mean either my career or a hip.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

Doggystyle, so we can both look at the river.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

The Netflix “Recommended For You” list is why I have trust issues.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

Crashed my car reading a billboard that said, “Don’t text and drive.”

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

My life is simple, I see a queue of more than 6 people, I go home.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

I would prefer not to.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

Paid my mortgage so don’t ask me to come out. I’m getting my money’s worth.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

Called in, “Hey, macarena!” this morning.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

If you buy something with a lifetime warranty and it breaks, the manufacturer will send a hitman to your house.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

Sometimes you choose the GIF-war over your responsibilities.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Messenger:

Sometimes I can’t believe people have had the honor of experiencing my love and chose to hurt me instead.

Breaking via Pinterest:

I mean, sex is all right, but have you ever experienced the sheer sensuality of having rock-solid proof that a problem at work was someone else’s fault, even though it really, really looked like it was yours?

Making waves on TikTok:

It’s crazy how genuinely entertaining it is to stare into an open fire. That’s some real epigenetic memory shit.

Just shared via Messenger:

My children are very helpful. For example, when I ask them to do something, they suggest a different child that could do it instead.

Going bananas on Reddit:

Had chicken and egg for dinner because I wanted to eat the whole family.

Just landed via Facebook:

Being strange is exhausting.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Bruschetta is 80% delicious and 20% mess.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Women are like apples; I like biting them.

Trending via Twitch:

Once you realize I’m an idiot, my posts start to make a lot more sense.

Just shared via WeChat:

If hot showers aren’t good for you then why do I emerge from them bright red like a beautiful ruby?

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

Funny Christmas CD quotes

New funny Christmas CD quotes 👇

Took my car to the mechanic because it was making a terrible noise. He removed the Mariah Carey Christmas CD, and now it’s fine.

All funny Christmas CD quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨