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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

Now I understand why old people sit outside just to sit outside.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

A dating app that matches people by the conspiracy theories they are interested in.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has viewed:

My mom always used to tell me that I look cute when I sleep. My boss has a different opinion.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

Showers are the best places to lose arguments with yourself.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

Saw someone from high school. She said she hadn’t seen me in years. That’s likely because I’d always seen her first.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

ALF is what happens when you are high on drugs in the 80s.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has shared:

If one door opens when another door closes, your house is probably haunted.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

I have no beef with vegetarians.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

Netflix has every movie except the one you want to watch.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

My head is starting to get dented from hitting rock bottom so often.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

819 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,981

Funny Quotes Topics

13,924

Funny Quotes Images

10,981

Updated

31 minutes ago

Users Online

3,440

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via X:

She never lets ideas interrupt the easy flow of her conversation.

Shared recently on Telegram:

When you think about it, Jesus really accomplished a lot in the four months between Christmas and Easter.

Trending via WeChat:

Awesome that January is over, but rude that our reward for getting through it is February.

Spotted on Reddit:

We all have needs. I need my wife to go run errands so I can swipe the last donut.

Trending via YouTube:

Doctors don’t really need to hit you with that rubber hammer, it’s just how they release a lil tension through the day.

Spotted on Twitch:

The sound of rain outside when you’re in bed is elite.

Just landed via Slack:

It may look like I’m doing nothing, but in my head I’m quite busy.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I think, therefore I am. I am, therefore I think. Therefore I am. I think.

Breaking via Messenger:

Sorry about all the mean stuff I said when I was right.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

819 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,981

Funny Quotes Topics

13,924

Funny Quotes Images

10,981

Updated

31 minutes ago

Users Online

3,423

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

Baby for sale. Refuses to wear shoes.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

Limbo is the only sport where being really bad at it means you’re raising the bar.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

Life is so funny because you think you look good today and a year later you look even better.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has viewed:

You’re old if you’re excited to learn how to play Mahjong.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

This body is a temple; I suicide bomb every day.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

I’ve been heading in the wrong direction for most of my life, but since the earth is round, I’m just going to stick with it and see it through.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has bookmarked:

Saying “shut up” before skipping the YouTube ad is literally necessary.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

Never eat more than you can lift.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

My mama didn’t raise a quitter, she raised a burnt out perfectionist who is sometimes bludgeoned into settling for mediocrity.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

Maybe your dog is barking at my luggage because he doesn’t enjoy his job, officer.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Reddit:

You didn’t let me know you got home safely so you better at least be injured or I’m gonna be pissed.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Getting excited to go to bed is a different level of adulting.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Starting drama with me the week before my period is an absolutely terrible idea – for you.

Reported on Pinterest:

If you have an old house, but you haven’t got a ghost, you should complain to the estate agent.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Anyone else think it’s weird how cancer kills more people than any other astrological sign.

Going viral on Slack:

Foo fighters still fighting foo.

Breaking via Snapchat:

I can’t do the splits. But so far there has never been a situation where I’ve thought, “I should do the splits now.”

Shared recently on YouTube:

I only go on LinkedIn to see what my coworkers looked like 15 years ago.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I didn’t expect to have such strong feelings when the subtitles said “smooching” while the actors were kissing.

Just shared via Reddit:

I hope this email finds you in the paradise city where the grass is green and the girls are pretty.

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