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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

In England “booster shot” is spelled “borchestershire shot”.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

Yes, hello, I’d like to exchange my generational trauma for generational wealth, please.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

Quit keeping your enemies closer. No wonder you feel like shit.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

Saw a shooting star and made a wish for everyone to stop talking to me.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

I like to just appear out of nowhere and say, “this looks like a job for a binder clip.”

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

Don’t ask me why, but the older you get, the more you love coffee.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has copied:

Hardest part of beekeeping is thinking of all the names.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

Let’s tell the truth cell phone. I don’t have six missed calls. I have six ignored calls.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

Needlenose in HR says we can’t use nicknames anymore.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

Maybe your soulmate’s just late, like, wildly behind schedule.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

765 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,927

Funny Quotes Topics

13,899

Funny Quotes Images

10,927

Updated

54 minutes ago

Users Online

3,430

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Instagram:

I’m soirée for my mispronunciation of French words.

Live now on LinkedIn:

When your name is Jenn, people think it’s short for Jennifer, but it’s really short for Jennatalia.

Trending via Facebook:

I pretend I don’t care about stuff, but that’s only because I have no idea what’s going on around me at any given time.

Seen just now on WeChat:

It was me, I let the dogs out.

Spotted on Telegram:

When we’re old, the children will use Covid to explain our brain damaged opinions much like we do to Boomers with lead. It is fate.

Reported on TikTok:

Statistically speaking, people don’t object enough at weddings.

Spotted on Reddit:

If history is repeating itself, when can I buy a pet dinosaur?

Breaking via Discord:

The best cuddles are the ones where you don’t have to deflate her when you’re done.

Seen just now on Twitch:

You’re not going to believe this, but I was doing really well, and then your email found me.

Making waves on Discord:

Nobody is meaner to me than me. So take your shot.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

765 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,927

Funny Quotes Topics

13,899

Funny Quotes Images

10,927

Updated

54 minutes ago

Users Online

3,443

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

You should get one IG story in addition to your one phone call when you’re arrested.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

How do I get recruited by a cult? I need some direction in my life.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

Lovingly looking at my dog knowing I’m about to ruin her day with a bath.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

If a baby comes out feet first, technically it wears its mom as a hat.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

Girls will be like “I have so much to do” then grab some snacks and start watching a 10 part docuseries on serial killers.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

Unless I say otherwise, I am always tired.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

You are not in a situationship. You are texting a man who doesn’t like you.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

My favorite emails are the ones that say your order has shipped.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has downloaded:

Whoever named them fitting rooms has a lot of nerve.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has copied:

I’d like to thank the municipal snow plow for recreating the wall from Game of Thrones at the end of my driveway.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Twitch:

The person opposite me has a donut. I do not have a donut. That should be my donut. This person is now my arch nemesis.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

If you can’t look back at your younger self and realize that you were an idiot, you are probably still an idiot.

Going viral on Reddit:

Shorts should be half the price of pants.

Reported on Threads:

Instead of likes, we should get a little kiss.

Spotted on WeChat:

You think you’ve seen gold diggers, until you see a male friend group where only one of them made it.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Tornados are just a bunch of ghosts fighting over a cow.

Trending via Instagram:

Starting tomorrow whatever life throws at me, I’m ducking so it hits someone else.

Broadcasted on Discord:

My rock bottom keeps refreshing.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Taking the day off to brush up on conspiracy theories and really get this Thanksgiving party started.

Making waves on Discord:

Can’t believe we stayed up and screamed “Happy New Year” for this shit.

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