Commentary:
Sounds like a "scorchingly" good time! 🔥🐉😆
19 Funny burn quotes
We used to burn CDs like we were running an underground record label.
Commentary:
"Ah, the good old days of risking it all to become a DJ with a stack of blank CDs! 🔥💿😎"
I wonder how many calories I can burn petting my cat.
Commentary:
Burning calories, one purr at a time! 🐾💪😺
The closest I get to a spa day is when I’m draining pasta, and the steam smacks me in the face.
Commentary:
Pasta steam facial: zero dollars, maximum relaxation 😉🍝💨
Trying to decide what to burn for dinner, so I can order pizza.
Commentary:
Cooking skills so advanced, I'm now a certified smoke signaler 🍕🔥😆
Let’s hope those bridges you burn keep you warm at night.
Commentary:
"🔥 Sleep tight in your toasty bridge bonfire! 😴🚧🤣"
Just burned 2,000 calories trying to avoid someone I know at Walmart.
Commentary:
"Who knew avoiding awkward encounters was the ultimate cardio workout? 😂🏃♂️💨 #WalmartOlympics"
His voice was like whiskey. Smooth with a slow burn that lit me up from the inside.
Commentary:
"Sounds like the kind of guy who can turn a karaoke night into a full-blown concert! 🎤🔥🥃"
How many calories does an audible sigh burn? Because I don’t think my Apple Watch is giving me credit for them.
If you scroll Twitter long enough, you too can burn calories by shaking your head.
Commentary:
Wow, Twitter should come with a warning label: "Caution! May result in unintentional exercise from vigorous head shaking 🤯💪😂 #TwitterWorkout"