Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

Every group chat has that one person who never replies, and it’s me.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has bookmarked:

You’re old if you’re excited to learn how to play Mahjong.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

Taking my heart off my sleeve, I fold it up neatly and carefully place it back inside my chest.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

Sane is boring.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

Girl, whatever you’re going through right now, as long as you’re not pregnant, you’re gonna be fine.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has shared:

When there’s food around, our cat is like an adorable, fluffy shark circling round.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

Using my invisible hula hoop really freaks people out.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

My body is 70% water and 30% tired of pretending I know what I’m doing.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

Considering joining a cult just for the subsidized housing.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has viewed:

Do you ever cycle through the same 4 apps on your phone over and over again, and feel like a tiger pacing its cage at the zoo?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,724

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Getting a nose ring, so I don’t lose my keys.

Going viral on Snapchat:

What a lot of people don’t understand about mountain climbing is that don’t do that.

Spotted on Slack:

I have friends in high places (birds).

Trending via Snapchat:

I don’t know much, but I know this: the older you get, the faster the number of things you’re willing to wait in line for approaches zero.

Trending via YouTube:

I’m neither a lover nor a fighter. I’m a snacker.

Seen just now on X:

Women are so hot, I wish they were good people.

Live now on X:

Why can’t you just be happy for me and then go home and talk behind my back later like a normal person?

Just shared via Threads:

Normalize mouthing the lyrics to the song in your headphones in public.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Forget carrying me to bed; carry me to the end of the workweek. Then we can talk.

Making waves on Facebook:

My wife didn’t order anything from Amazon yesterday, so the driver gave us a knock this morning to make sure we were OK.

Funny financial irresponsibility quotes

New funny financial irresponsibility quotes 👇

All funny financial irresponsibility quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

71 shares on Pinterest this month:

Can we get some A.I. to pick plastic out of the ocean, or do all the robots need to be poets?

90 shares on YouTube this month:

Sorry for being so cringey and awkward. It will definitely happen again.

10 shares on Instagram this month:

Getting the house to yourself for a night is basically winning the lottery.

37 shares on YouTube this month:

Ears are great for tucking your hair behind in the wind. Big shout out to ears.

97 shares on Facebook this month:

Every person you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Make it worse by asking if they’re drinking enough water.

79 shares on Reddit this month:

In honor of the fall equinox, I will also be cold, distant and filled with darkness.

79 shares on Messenger this month:

Forgetting your phone at home is the modern equivalent of leaving your sword behind in medieval times.

22 shares on WeChat this month:

A haunted house, but it’s just a room full of people asking you to tell them a fun fact about yourself.

33 shares on Reddit this month:

Cutting my steak at Texas Roadhouse with my car keys.

82 shares on YouTube this month:

Scrolling should count as cardio.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Your phone is a casino designed to steal your time.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

May her tire get flat with a dude who can’t change it.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

There should be a “Take Your Friend to Work Day,” so we can actually see what our friends do all day and meet the characters from all their work stories.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

If they played poker with potato chips, I’d have a gambling problem.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve touched enough cacti to know they are sharp, but also not enough to stop touching cacti.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

The dopamine hit of getting an Outlook meeting cancellation is unrivaled.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Can you imagine how hot I’d be if I ate right and took care of my body? I’m not gonna do it, but can you imagine?

18 folks are currently checking 👀

By the time someone says, ‘To make a long story short,’ it’s too late.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

When you think about it, Jesus really accomplished a lot in the four months between Christmas and Easter.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

One time, I was so high my bra unclasped, and I thought I got shot.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,332

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

Some of you aren’t reading the room. Not even listening to the room on audiobook.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

I got a lot of Jedi advice for somebody who could be turned to the dark side by moderate traffic.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

We live in a time where intelligent people are being silenced, so that stupid people won’t be offended.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

I could never commit gun violence. The only things I know how to reload are my pill caddy and the batteries for the remote.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has bookmarked:

Please respond to the messages I almost sent you.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

It’s been so long since I had sex last, went jogging in flip flops just to remember the sound.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has bookmarked:

Date idea: you tell me every thought you’ve ever had about me.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has shared:

I can’t believe we live in the timeline where we invented a technology to make it so we can never trust a photo or video again.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

After a lot of experience, I can conclude that one can never actually cross “washing dishes” off the to-do list.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

A thousand curses upon anyone who has ever gone, “Why are you sitting in the dark?” and then flipped the light on without asking.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Slack:

Piñatas are a fun way to intentionally maim the guests at your party.

Breaking via Reddit:

If I ever win the lottery and decide to invest in a billboard company, I won’t tell anyone; but there will be signs.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Shrimp: “When I grow up, I want to be food waste at a gala.”

Spotted on Telegram:

People tell introverts to talk more and get out of their comfort zone, but no one tells extroverts to shut up to make the zone comfortable.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I like when games that have no need for a jump button have a jump button.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

“It could be drugs,” I tell myself as I buy more books.

Making waves on Twitch:

People think I forgot the shit they said. Ain’t no expiration date on disrespect.

Just shared via Twitch:

All my favorite activities involve a mattress.

Trending via Facebook:

Kids don’t love anything as much as they love arguing with each other.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Telling my coworkers I can’t talk in meetings today because I need to save my voice for concerts this weekend.

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