Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

The amount of water you actually need to drink to be hydrated is so obscene. Who does this body think it is? A data center?

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

Grab your own butt! Love yourself!

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

Sometimes it feels better not to talk. At all. About anything. To anyone.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has copied:

The sexual tension between my tendency to do something stupid and my resolve not to.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has viewed:

Noise-canceling headphones aren’t enough, I need everyone to shut up.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

Last night the Internet stopped working so I spent a few hours with my family. They seem like good people.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

Some people are storms dressed like sunsets. Beautiful from a distance. Dangerous up close.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

I didn’t know that Rome wasn’t built in a day. I wasn’t on that job.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has viewed:

All my passwords are protected by short term memory loss.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

They should invent a grocery store that’s just for me and no one else.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,324

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Telegram:

Some people are storms dressed like sunsets. Beautiful from a distance. Dangerous up close.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

The enemy of my enemy is my friend. But I’m my own worst enemy, so I guess I’m also my best friend.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Full-time employment will have you making lists of thoughts to think.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

A fitness trainer showed me the proper way to inhale and exhale and then got pissed when I told her she had nice breaths.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I know I’m mad when I start talking to myself about it.

Spotted on YouTube:

I would prefer not to.

Just shared via Slack:

What did people do before eyeglasses, like half the world just walked around not being able to see?

Spotted on Threads:

It’s a fabulous time to be alive if you love: verification codes, verifying your email, yelling ‘REAL PERSON’ into a phone at a robot, reading nightmarish news all day, every day, hot.

Making waves on Threads:

You seem really unhinged, we should grab coffee sometime.

Just landed via TikTok:

I can relate to God because it also takes me a full week to finish something that still kind of sucks.

Funny gifting quotes

New funny gifting quotes 👇

All funny gifting quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

83 shares on Reddit this month:

Got a new Roomba but keeping the old one to see if I can get them to fight.

59 shares on Messenger this month:

Diabetes was the God of sugar.

90 shares on WeChat this month:

Jeans have the tendency of looking neat when you’re about to wash them.

37 shares on WeChat this month:

As president, I will allow people to use the same password as before when changing their password.

75 shares on Discord this month:

Humans should grow a new set of teeth in our 30s to make-up for all the poor decisions in our 20s.

59 shares on Discord this month:

Don’t ever let a recipe tell you how much cheese you need to add, everyone knows cheese is measured with the heart.

73 shares on YouTube this month:

When I worked as a restaurant critic, I wrote under a nom nom nom de plume.

10 shares on Slack this month:

Twitter is the most fun you can have on the toilet.

74 shares on X this month:

How much chocolate is too much chocolate before it is technically no longer a salad?

55 shares on Messenger this month:

This meeting should’ve been a fist fight.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Babe, are you OK? It’s already Q4, and you’ve barely touched your “2025 roadmap.”

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Big fan of calling artists their first name and then the band name as their last name.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

In your 20s, there will be a cat, and it is very important to get that cat and spend so much money on it.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Rent really don’t make no sense. Like, why is my apartment getting a raise every year? Who is doing the performance review?

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Shut up brain, I wasn’t even talking to me.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Normalize booing in the workplace.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing in a household is said more lovingly than, “Can you bring me some toilet paper?”

6 folks are currently checking 👀

If you want your kid to play with their toy just give it to your other kid. Follow me for more parenting hacks.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Frodo is a beautiful name for a boy. Has a ring to it.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve been a main character since birth.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,745

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

You can have glossy lips or you can have a cat. You can’t have both.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

It’s okay to embarrass yourself a little in the pursuit of human connection.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has bookmarked:

If you see me looking zoned out, it’s because I’m having a therapy session with myself in my head.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

Cancelling a date so I can order pizza and go to bed at 8:30 p.m.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

Feeling feral. Better make some mac and cheese.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

Why is smoking the only addiction jobs give you breaks to do? I should get 15 minutes every hour to cook up some parlays.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

Imagine being hungry and some guy tries to teach you to fish.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

Adding “Free HBO” to your dating profile isn’t the game changer you’d think it’d be.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

Tired of my landlord depending on my rent. Bro, get a job.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

In honor of Charles Dickens, I will also be poor this Christmas.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Reddit:

I wish men had sluttier outfit options. Because why am I in a mini skirt, and you’re in a quarter zip?

Seen just now on Facebook:

I have no beef with vegetarians.

Just shared via TikTok:

Good morning, dickhead, your little ray of sarcastic sunshine has arrived.

Spotted on Instagram:

This is an awful time to be an educated person.

Making waves on Instagram:

You guys know your secrets are safe with me. It’s the people I share them with you can’t trust.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

69 but we both just farting.

Just shared via Slack:

If an alien is 60 million light years away and is watching us through a telescope, it will see dinosaurs.

Live now on Snapchat:

Who really needs jetpacks, I want to be able to start over from my last save point.

Seen just now on Facebook:

My husband is the do-it-yourself type. I asked him to take out the garbage and he said, “do it yourself.”

Spotted on Snapchat:

Speaker phone in public should be illegal.

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