Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

There are beautiful horny women (me) being forced into celibacy due to the utter lack of worthy men in existence. This is the world we are living in now.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

Unfollowing high school people really is a form of self-care.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

My self-care routine is mostly just going to Mexican restaurants.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

So stupid how New York is actually as cool as everyone says.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has bookmarked:

The real miracle is how Jesus managed to book a table for twenty-six people on the night before the Easter holiday, and then only half them showed up.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has bookmarked:

The best part about your kids being sick is you get to see exactly how shitty you’re going to feel in 48 hours.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

Sometimes when I’m having a particularly stressful day, I take a pregnancy test to remind myself that at least one thing in my life is still going as planned.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

Having children is a pyramid scheme.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has downloaded:

You couldn’t pay me to do this year again.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

Picking up women at the bar and then gently setting them down.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,296

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Pinterest:

All I think about is death and sex.

Breaking via Slack:

I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people.

Going bananas on Telegram:

Australia is like someone’s still playing Jumanji.

Going viral on TikTok:

Attention: will the owner of a small blue planet with tectonic plates please attend to your vehicle. It is overheating.

Spotted on YouTube:

I don’t wanna brag, but I’ve been told I’m micro-management material.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Girlhood is sitting down in a boiling hot shower instead of dealing with life.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

You don’t have to check your Spotify Wrapped, you are the most played this year.

Trending via Telegram:

If I was ever told to “dress to impress”, my first thought would be to get the Batman suit out.

Broadcasted on Threads:

The next man who speaks to me will be sacrificed to the gods for a bountiful harvest.

Shared recently on Threads:

Don’t let anyone tell you, you can’t do something. Show them you can’t.

Funny hottest thing quotes

Funny hottest thing quotes bring the heat 🔥 with a splash of humor 😂! Perfect for those moments when you want to turn up the charm and crack a smile 😏. Whether you’re flirting, roasting, or just having fun, these witty lines will keep things sizzling 🌶️ and light-hearted. Ready to spice up your day? Let’s dive into some laugh-out-loud moments that are seriously hot stuff! 😎🔥

New funny hottest thing quotes 👇

All funny hottest thing quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

46 shares on Discord this month:

I accidentally hit a parked car, so I left them a note that said “next time it will be you”.

57 shares on Snapchat this month:

I only attract psychopaths. If you’ve ever had a crush on me, find a therapist.

76 shares on Discord this month:

Men be like, “You’ve been different ever since I disrespected you.”

86 shares on Pinterest this month:

There is certainly no life on other planets. Otherwise our government would have sent money there long ago.

38 shares on YouTube this month:

Men only have money the first month of dating, that’s recruitment budget, never confuse it with operational budget.

98 shares on YouTube this month:

“You’re such a stalker!” God forbid a woman wants to know more about her future husband.

54 shares on Threads this month:

Going out on Friday night will always be better than going out on a Saturday night.

75 shares on Facebook this month:

Whenever an insect rides for miles on my car, I imagine it thinking: “Oh crap, moving again!”

60 shares on WhatsApp this month:

What are some beginner pieces of information for somebody just getting into knowledge?

73 shares on TikTok this month:

In 2007, if you wore a long-sleeve T-shirt under a regular T-shirt, it meant that you liked music.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

9 folks are currently checking 👀

If boring was a brand, you’d be the ambassador.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

How many times does one have to open the fridge door before cake appears inside?

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry, I booped your nose, but I was really hoping it was a mute button.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

We get it, comma, you went to Oxford.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

The most refreshing way to fight your personal demons is to make demonade.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Girl, you gotta try this healing potion. It’s called beer.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Sat at a stop sign waiting for it to turn green, if you’re wondering how I’m doing today.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Asking my landlord if he has any Cyber Monday deals.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here talking baby talk to my plants.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Of course, a wife can complain to her mother-in-law. She has every right to complain to the manufacturer.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,507

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

I’m not totally useless. I can be used as a bad example.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

I’m having a bad day. Please send super-cute pics of your credit cards to cheer me up.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has viewed:

Have a good weekend, unless you have other plans.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

Good morning to everyone except the people who are missing the ability to read the room.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has downloaded:

Just heard my knee crack so loud I expected it to glow in the dark.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

The only thing faster than an escalator is an escasooner.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

I’m inventing a website for unemployed people called LinkedOut.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

Enjoy the time between diapers!

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

(british guy unhooking your bra) All right, what’s all this, then?

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Breaking News: Local woman stuns in new unnecessary online purchase.

Spotted on Slack:

Just got emotional imagining a worm emerging from its cocoon as a dragonfly and then got even more emotional remembering that’s not what they do.

Spotted on TikTok:

If you step on the back of my shoe and it comes off, I will do the same thing to your head.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I just refuse to take a single bite of my food until I find something good to watch.

Going bananas on Instagram:

Source? Divine intuition, gut instinct, and cryptic symbolism from my dreams.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Cool times create cool guys.

Just shared via Reddit:

It’s always a huge relief when I’m reading a list of symptoms of a deadly disease, and it says unexplained weight loss.

Going bananas on Slack:

I love when someone is telling a story and you can tell even from their version that they’re the villain.

Just shared via Messenger:

I firmly believe that at this point my guardian angel is just eating popcorn and watching the drama.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

That awkward moment between birth and death.

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