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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

Christmas can be really hard for single people. Everyone else is having a brilliant time and we have to hide the fact that every day is like that for us.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

I’ve already picked out my sweatpants for New Year’s Eve.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

If an ice cream truck has its music on, are you supposed to pull over and let it pass like an ambulance?

Someone from 🇲🇱 has shared:

Going to work has backfired on me so many times.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

December you will be good to me (threateningly).

Someone from 🇲🇩 has copied:

My wife rearranged the kitchen cabinets, and now I’ll never eat again.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has copied:

Landlord: I’m raising your rent. Me: Am I getting a bigger house?

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

You can’t boss me around. You’re not my bladder.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has viewed:

I did a little research on why weekends are only two days long and it turns out people made that up. WTF, people?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

832 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,994

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,994

Updated

3 hours ago

Users Online

3,443

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via LinkedIn:

If someone asks why you’re so pale, simply reply, completely shocked, “You can see me?”

Breaking via TikTok:

People will think you know what you’re talking about if you give your opinion while cleaning a pair of reading glasses.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

“The engine light is on!” Yeah, that means it’s working.

Trending via TikTok:

Just saw two identical twins out in public together. No disrespect to that lifestyle but please keep it private.

Going viral on Messenger:

“Please feel free to ignore this email!” Way ahead of you, buddy.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

One day you’re young and fun and the next you’re excited about your organized fridge.

Live now on Threads:

My life is based on a true story.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

One of the hardest things to do as an adult is to go back to work after a long weekend.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

She left me because of my poor English. But I doesn’t care.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Every time your mom tells you that she wants the best for you, she is talking about me.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm sleep social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

832 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,994

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,994

Updated

3 hours ago

Users Online

3,437

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇦 has viewed:

11:00 am – Anything is possible. 3:00 pm – But not today.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

Most puns make me feel numb, but math puns make me feel number.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has copied:

Just because your parents planned you doesn’t mean you weren’t a mistake.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

The History Channel, because where else are you going to learn about how aliens were instrumental in the development of humanity?

Someone from 🇱🇰 has shared:

The state of my house can best be described as “there seems to have been a struggle”.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

If you ever get locked out of your house, talk to your lock calmly. Because communication is key.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

Sometimes I’m just so exhausted I have to go to bed and scroll my phone for the next 2-3 hours.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

I hate apps that shut off your music when you open them, like how fu*king important do you think you are?

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

If I text you at 8:10, you’re supposed to reply at 8:09.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has copied:

They say money can’t buy happiness, but could someone just give me a lot of it and let me see for myself?

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Snapchat:

“I asked ChatGPT.” “I asked Grok.” I asked God to strike me dead with lightning.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Kinda messed up that the government knows my birthday but never sends me a gift or anything.

Just shared via Reddit:

Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth.

Shared recently on Threads:

When I say someone is a good doctor, it’s entirely based on the strength of their waiting room Wi-Fi.

Making waves on Reddit:

Never vacuuming so I don’t disrupt my carpet’s natural micro biome.

Just landed via X:

Nobody is meaner to me than me. So take your shot.

Going viral on Instagram:

I asked myself if I was the problem and we said no.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Want to lose weight for the summer? Don’t worry, just check in your luggage at the airport. You’ll never see those pounds again.

Live now on X:

I just sneezed and farted at the same time. I think my body just took a screenshot.

Making waves on Messenger:

My love language is deader than Latin.

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