94 funny meeting quotes - Page 2 - Wordgag

If this meeting were any slower, it’d be a landscape painting.

Mar 29, 2026

This meeting could have been a painting in a museum of boredom.

Mar 29, 2026

You can be anything. Be the person who ends the meeting early.

Mar 29, 2026

This meeting could have been an oil painting.

Mar 29, 2026

This meeting should’ve been a fist fight.

Mar 29, 2026

Every Microsoft Teams invite you get lowers your testosterone by 1-2%

Mar 29, 2026

I’m not drunk enough for this Teams meeting.

Mar 29, 2026

If my coworker doesn’t stop asking questions on this Zoom meeting, I will drive across town and slap his face on the call.

Mar 28, 2026

I bring a very “are you going to eat your pickle” vibe to lunch meetings.

Mar 28, 2026

Never meeting another person again, so if I know you already, congrats!

Mar 28, 2026

This meeting could have been an AI summary.

Mar 28, 2026

When you meet twins, demand to speak with the one in charge.

Mar 28, 2026

You want me to attend a work meeting? The thing that killed Julius Caesar?

Mar 28, 2026

Pretending I’m asleep so my boss has to carry me to the meeting.

Mar 28, 2026

This meeting could have been an unread email.

Mar 28, 2026

Have come to the devastating realization that I am an over-nodder on video calls.

Mar 27, 2026

If I met someone like me, I’d be really concerned for them.

Mar 27, 2026

How dare my boss set up a meeting for the time I sneak off early?

Mar 27, 2026

Trust my gut? The thing that makes weird gurgling noises immediately when a work meeting goes quiet.

Mar 27, 2026

Text a co-worker at a random time “are you joining this meeting?” as a fun holiday prank.

Mar 27, 2026

Workplace Wrapped: you had 60k minutes of meetings this year that could’ve been an email.

Mar 27, 2026

So annoying that in order to meet new people you need to go out and meet new people. Ideally, I would have known you in a past life.

Mar 27, 2026

A late person is never happier than when the person they’re meeting is later than them.

Mar 27, 2026

I hate it when you ask what you thought was a simple question in a meeting at work, and it turns into another meeting.

Mar 26, 2026

This meeting could have been a push down the stairs.

Mar 26, 2026

Hello 911? Yes, my wife is forcing me to walk over to meet the neighbors.

Mar 26, 2026

If you meet me and I’m talking to myself, just keep walking. I’m self-employed and I’m in a meeting with senior management.

Mar 26, 2026

I’m so good at missing early morning meetings, I can do it with my eyes closed.

Mar 26, 2026

Many years ago, I stood up to 100-200 million others only to sit in meetings now.

Mar 26, 2026

Sexting is hilarious, when you think about it. Like, this email truly should’ve been a meeting.

Mar 26, 2026

You never forget your first kiss. Or your first meeting with HR.

Mar 26, 2026

Meeting Beyoncé and telling her I loved her in Goldmember and mentioning nothing about her music career, just to see if it throws her off.

Mar 26, 2026

My sleep apnea was diagnosed at a staff meeting.

Mar 26, 2026

This meeting could have been a pajama party.

Mar 26, 2026

The horror of being warned that the person you’re about to meet is “fine once you get to know them”.

Mar 26, 2026

Gonna mess with my husband by texting “send nudes” when he’s in a work meeting.

Mar 26, 2026

The most realistic scene in Star Wars was when Darth Vader lost his cool during a staff meeting and used the force to choke a coworker.

Mar 25, 2026

This meeting could have been a cake.

Mar 25, 2026

Saying “sounds good to me” in a meeting then quickly realizing a lot more was expected from you.

Mar 25, 2026

Told a couple of jokes at a Zoom meeting. Turns out I’m not even remotely funny.

Mar 25, 2026