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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

Is it fall yet? I really can’t suck my stomach in much longer.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

Maybe there’s an alternate universe where onions cry when they chop up humans, you don’t know.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

There aren’t enough rap songs about cutting coupons.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

When I try to figure out rows vs. columns, I just row away in my boat of confusion!

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

It’s like ten thousand views when all you need is a like.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has copied:

Revenge? No. I just post hot selfies and let the algorithm do God’s work.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

“I asked ChatGPT.” Okay, well, I asked my mom.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

Autocorrect is like a tiny person inside your phone that sometimes gets drunk and says the dumbest things.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

I just come here for the free life advice and inspirational quotes from people who’s lives are complete train wrecks.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

Whenever Im in trouble, I think, what would Jesus do? Then I pretend to be dead and disappear for 3 days.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2249 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,411

Funny Quotes Topics

15,118

Funny Quotes Images

12,411

Updated

1 hour ago

Users Online

3,453

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Instagram:

When I’m drafting a legal document, I’ll sprinkle the word “herein” all over that thing like it’s paprika.

Shared recently on Messenger:

I only go for nature walks with people I can outrun.

Making waves on Reddit:

I put my music on shuffle then get mad when it doesn’t play the song I want.

Just landed via Slack:

“Well, this is no good. How do I turn it off?” – The first primate to experience consciousness.

Freshly posted on Slack:

If food delivery apps had never been invented, I would either be wildly rich or dead.

Just shared via Threads:

If you get cremated after you die, you can be put into an hourglass and still participate in family game nights.

Going viral on Telegram:

Concert tickets should be 75% off if the artist is really super special to you.

Live now on Threads:

My favorite body lotion is Voltaren.

Just landed via Reddit:

He’s a 10 but so is his volume.

Live now on Instagram:

Remember: The first step to recovery is addiction.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2249 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,411

Funny Quotes Topics

15,118

Funny Quotes Images

12,411

Updated

1 hour ago

Users Online

3,440

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇰 has viewed:

It’s Monday, but at what cost?

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

You can’t scare me; you’re not my credit card bill.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

Our neighbor complained that our cat is always running through his garden. My father said: “Okay, I’ll tell her.”

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

I don’t know why hair extensions are exclusive to women, I want to look like a centaur.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely touched your unread books.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

I don’t abuse substances. I cherish and nurture them.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

I am not old. I am in the prime of my decay.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

Is it healthier to drink tap water and let the fluoride calcify my pineal gland or drink bottled spring water and let micro plastics settle in my balls?

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

Cool things happen when you start hanging out outside a lot. Animals just appear and stuff.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

I’m pretty sure I fall under the percentage of people who’ve eaten the sticker on the apple.

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on Threads:

I’m not ready to adopt a highway, I can barely raise my own driveway.

Shared recently on Slack:

Instead of being constantly irritated by other people’s flaws, I’ve decided to become more self-absorbed.

Spotted on Facebook:

I have no desire to rekindle anything with anyone. See you never.

Going viral on Facebook:

Village life is when you send two kids out to play and six kids come back hungry.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I’ve reached the age where I would rather go to a hardware store than a club.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Dear Aliens, Now would be a good time. Thanks!

Going viral on Pinterest:

Never get in between a girl and her fries. It’s just common sense really.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

The prettier you are, the weirder it gets.

Trending via WeChat:

Me: what can possibly go wrong though. Anxiety: I’m glad you asked.

Live now on Reddit:

I’m a credit card, cause I’m always being used or denied.

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