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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇸 has shared:

Second day without coffee. I can no longer hear out of my left eye.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

I used to sell furniture for a living. The trouble was, it was my own.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

Rapunzel, let down your CVS receipt!

Someone from 🇧🇭 has viewed:

The universe consists of 5% protons, 5% neutrons, 5% electrons, and 85% morons.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

It’s not my fault that when I said you looked “stunning” you assumed I meant in a positive way.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

Toothpaste sure knows how to ruin whatever you’re drinking.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

People on diet aren’t mad at you. They’re mad at their lunch.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

One thing I hate more than a liar is a liar that thinks I’m dumb.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

All positions for annoying people in my life have been filled. Applicants need not apply, thank you.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has downloaded:

Not being able to see Likes on posts is a tragedy. Love it when two people are arguing and you can see all their little backup dancers.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

760 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,922

Funny Quotes Topics

13,890

Funny Quotes Images

10,922

Updated

49 minutes ago

Users Online

3,419

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Messenger:

A Jackie Chan fight scene where he’s in an IKEA warehouse and he fights off dudes with furniture pieces, but by the end he’s accidentally assembled it all into a complete Malm bedroom set.

Trending via WeChat:

Maybe if we all sit extremely still, Monday won’t be able to see us.

Reported on X:

I gotta ask, what part of ‘I don’t eat sugar’ don’t I understand?

Seen just now on TikTok:

Are you there, bathroom walls, ceiling, floor, mirror, sink, and towels? It’s me, the kids toothpaste.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Look, babe, I’m sorry. If your fake British accent keeps being this geographically inconsistent, I’m going to have to cancel the medieval roleplay sex.

Seen just now on Reddit:

You ever wake up in the morning and your first thought is ‘I can’t wait to go to bed tonight’?

Making waves on Facebook:

My favorite dinner is the one made by someone else.

Just shared via Twitch:

Being friends with introverts is hard sometimes. Did they die? Are they just recharging? Are they Batman now? The suspense is killing me.

Reported on TikTok:

You ever feel awkward in Target, cause you know you belong at Walmart.

Shared recently on Messenger:

I admire the audacity of beavers, they just move to a new area and say “screw the neighbors, imma put a lake here”.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology think time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

760 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,922

Funny Quotes Topics

13,890

Funny Quotes Images

10,922

Updated

49 minutes ago

Users Online

3,416

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

Nobody sighs louder than an unemployed, debt-free dog who spends at least 16 hours a day sleeping.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

It was the becestershire of times, it was the worcestershire of times.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has bookmarked:

Google AI is awesome because it kills the planet and doesn’t work.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

I’m best man at my buddy’s second wedding. Is it appropriate to open my dinner speech with “Welcome back everyone”?

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

The art of today’s art is to persuade people that it’s art.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

I’m equally comfortable holding a guitar as I am holding a baby, I just hold them both by the neck.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

Adults are always asking children what they want to be when they grow up because they’re looking for ideas.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

My doctor told me to eat more Taco Bell. Well, he actually said “less McDonald’s”, but I’m pretty sure I know what he meant.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

After having a week off, my boss returns to work today. Please respect my privacy during this difficult time.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has viewed:

True bravery is getting a text from a woman with three questions in it, and only responding to one.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on TikTok:

Some things are better left alone, like me, for instance.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Light is faster than sound. That’s why people seem so bright until you hear them talk.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Everyone’s a gangster until their doorbell rings.

Just shared via Slack:

I don’t flirt, I just say weird things and hope something sticks.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Why can’t I explore the dentist’s mouth too?

Trending via Telegram:

Bored as hell. Anyone want to emotionally manipulate each other?

Going viral on Instagram:

The first 120 hours after the weekend are always the worst.

Just landed via Telegram:

It’s crazy I need a certificate to prove I was born when you can literally just look at me.

Live now on WhatsApp:

I feel sorry for non-glasses wearers. They’ll never know the joy of cleaning them and suddenly being upgraded to the UHD package.

Reported on Discord:

Due to rising prices, Dollar Tree is changing their name to ‘Tree Fiddy’.

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