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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

Not to brag, but I finished an entire book in one sitting. I’m going to need some new crayons.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

My favorite part about being sick is when you sneeze with a cough drop in your mouth and it launches across the room like a cruise missile.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

Wisdom of the day: Don’t do anything you don’t want to explain to the paramedic.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

When I’m behind a slow car, I steer my car a little to the right so the people behind me can see that it isn’t my fault.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

Sex is cool but have you ever had a king size bed all to yourself.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

I know my limits. I don’t always obey them, but I know them.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

I don’t run from my problems. I sit on my couch, play on my phone, and ignore them like all other adults.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

Due to personal reasons, I’ve decided to become your problem.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

My keyboard must be broken, I keep hitting the escape key, but I’m still at work.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

Every day, a new coworker asks if you’ve used ChatGPT, and the conversation doesn’t end if you say “No.”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2127 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,289

Funny Quotes Topics

15,016

Funny Quotes Images

12,289

Updated

1 minute ago

Users Online

3,442

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Twitch:

The grass is only greener on the other side because of all the bullshit on it.

Trending via YouTube:

Doctors are always giving me Ibuprofen. Man, give me something I can sell.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Welcome to adulthood: 9pm is midnight now.

Just landed via Telegram:

If idiots could fly, TikTok would be an airport.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

My brain is 80% song lyrics.

Seen just now on X:

I love diss tracks because it’s basically two dudes going, “grr, we hate each other so much we’re going to take turns writing increasingly personalized poetry!”

Spotted on Instagram:

Today is a wonderful day to leave me alone.

Seen just now on Facebook:

When you’re two beers in, and you realize she looks like God.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Funny thing about zombie movies – they never seem to go after the cameraman.

Live now on Twitch:

I hope this email kills us both.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2127 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,289

Funny Quotes Topics

15,016

Funny Quotes Images

12,289

Updated

1 minute ago

Users Online

3,432

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

Sign at the zoo says “don’t stick your hand in the alligator cage”. Thanks, but I’ll do my own research.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

I don’t need therapy, I need a bagel with cream cheese.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has downloaded:

I dare you to try and be more single than me.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

In my defense, Your Honor, I was left unsupervised.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

If you think swimming with dolphins is expensive, you should try swimming with sharks. It cost me an arm and a leg!

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

This is my phone. I text back when I want to.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

If you’re feeling a little uneasy about the state of global geopolitics, remember to spend as much time on your phone as possible. The more information you ingest as you scroll, the calmer you will become.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has shared:

Welcome to social media. A person who does not understand humor will contact you shortly.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

Sending messages is easy. Living with them forever is the hard part.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

We could all be hibernating right now but noooooo we have to be “adults” with “responsibilities”.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WeChat:

The Playstation is broken and the child has noticed that I live here too.

Just shared via Slack:

That awkward moment between birth and death.

Going viral on Telegram:

Why be just a part of the solution when you can be the whole problem?

Going viral on YouTube:

I can’t blame this generation too much for doing stupid stuff. My generation thought seven Police Academy movies were a good idea.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Please, if you ever offer me a snack and I say no, ask me again, I didn’t mean it the first time.

Going viral on WeChat:

Can I come over and overstay my welcome?

Trending via Messenger:

Workplace Wrapped: you had 60k minutes of meetings this year that could’ve been an email.

Seen just now on Discord:

Forgot my glasses, so I’m pointing at a random spot on the menu and hoping for the best.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

I respect the moon’s unwillingness to be photographed on a phone.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

You’re not stuck in traffic. You are traffic.

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