Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

I would be very interested to hear from someone who is ILLEGALLY blind.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has copied:

After hearing that I have too many books and too many bookshelves, I’ve decided to cut back on the amount of people I listen to.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

When I turned into the harbor of marriage, I didn’t know that a warship was anchored there.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

I don’t understand why judges get paid so much, others judge me for free.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

Life is weird and then you die.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

Job hunting has legitimately been the most demoralizing experience of my life. Nothing else will make you realize how little you can actually do.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

Should I ever be mean and insulting, then it comes from the bottom of my heart.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has copied:

Vaginally speaking, he seems nice.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has bookmarked:

I am half agony, half hope.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

70% of marriage is yelling “What” from a different room.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,300

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via YouTube:

Wild how we don’t get a public holiday for Wrestlemania, but okay.

Trending via Twitch:

Never in the history of calming down has anyone calmed down after being told to calm down.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Opposites often not only attract each other, they often also undress each other.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

Polish girls are just winter Latinas.

Live now on YouTube:

Hate when people ask “why is it called Silence of the Lambs?” Like, did you hear any lambs during the movie? Use your head!

Broadcasted on Twitch:

I’m tired of being an adult. Therefore, I will be stepping down. Thank you!

Breaking via Pinterest:

Stop normalizing things, we’ll run out of the weird shit.

Freshly posted on Slack:

People who don’t like pickles are so important because they give me their pickles.

Just shared via WeChat:

People that never want to leave the house unite! Separately at our own homes.

Spotted on Reddit:

Yes, money alone does not make you happy. It has to be yours too.

Funny pole quotes

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New funny pole quotes 👇

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Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

57 shares on Slack this month:

The problem with rich people is that I am not one.

73 shares on Pinterest this month:

What’s y’all’s favorite burner on your stove? Mine is front left. That’s my boy. That’s my big dawg.

52 shares on Slack this month:

I’m still trying to dig myself out my ringtone debt from the late 90’s.

55 shares on LinkedIn this month:

There must be an opposite of suicide, where someone suddenly and radically decides to start living, and rescues their own life from meaninglessness.

28 shares on YouTube this month:

If I had known I looked this sexy in glasses, I would’ve stopped being able to see a long time ago.

98 shares on TikTok this month:

You ever get into such a weird mood you have to put yourself on house arrest for a couple days?

21 shares on Twitch this month:

Microdosing Christmas by being present.

17 shares on WeChat this month:

If you need me, I will be at the library sniffing old books.

97 shares on TikTok this month:

Don’t judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect.

11 shares on Reddit this month:

Introducing WifeChat™, the app where you talk to your wife.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

15 folks are currently checking 👀

A recent study showed that people who are reading this text thought they were learning something useful.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Me, waiting on an email: What the hell is taking so long, this is ridiculous. Me, sending an email: this can probably wait another three weeks or so.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Why there is always a kid crying when I go to the store? Dude, you aren’t the one paying for it. Stop!

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Yes, I know there is a really special place in hell for me. It’s called a throne.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Why does Bruce Wayne, the billionaire, not simply rig Gotham City’s elections in favor of tough-on-crime candidates?

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but you don’t need anything from Amazon today.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they’re the ones who can sign you into a home.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

A Southerner dies every time you people type “ya’ll” instead of “y’all,” btw.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s wild that “Jason” is a name from ancient Greece, because it sounds like it was invented in Florida in 1983.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Date night idea: fight another couple.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,761

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

I don’t get mad anymore. I’m just like “again?” Ok then.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

Life’s too short to remove the USB drive safely.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has downloaded:

Finding a person to make eye contact with during stupid meetings is essential to survival in the workplace.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

I was talking to someone and combined “all good” and “no worries” by saying “all worries”, which was a lot more accurate.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

If I got possessed demonically, I wouldn’t even notice it. With everything else I’ve got going on.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

I don’t post for money or fame, I post because there’s something seriously wrong with me.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has downloaded:

I march to the beat of my own dumb.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

The only thing I miss from my past is that flat stomach I had.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

The opposite of “taking candy from a baby” is “putting sunscreen on a toddler.”

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

My favorite part about going camping is the part where I stay at home, and I don’t go camping.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WeChat:

Everything I like is either expensive, illegal, or wont text me back.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Peak delusion is believing that a paragraph will make someone treat you better.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Just had a salad but it didn’t make me laugh like women in stock photos.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

At this point making life choices involves liquor and a dart board.

Breaking via Discord:

I have more photos of food on my phone than I do of my children.

Just landed via Instagram:

When I finally snap it’ll be because I had to type my email address in on the TV.

Breaking via Pinterest:

Apparently, throwing the remote against the wall didn’t help recharging the batteries.

Spotted on TikTok:

All I think about is death and sex.

Shared recently on Reddit:

The most refreshing way to fight your personal demons is to make demonade.

Breaking via YouTube:

We’re putting that movie you love back in theaters on one random Wednesday — and we’re not gonna tell you until Tuesday.

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