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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

When you realize your punishments as a kid (stay home, take a nap, no junk food, go to bed early) are now your goals as an adult.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

If you’re riding in my car, that little middle piece is for my elbow — not yours.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

Doesn’t matter if the chicken or the egg came first. Still a weird thing to just appear.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

I only write when I am falling in love, or falling apart.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

While a leaf blower is a close second, my preferred cleaner is a flamethrower.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

A simple “hi” can be the beginning of two years of therapy.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

A big part of my wife’s cardio routine is rolling away from me in bed.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

Adulting is realizing you can’t skip work like you skipped class.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

Tryna choke on gummy bears so my tombstone can read ‘killed by a bear’

Someone from 🇧🇮 has copied:

I just hit the back arrow on a website, and it took me to a page that said, “Before you leave.” No. I already made the decision.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,632

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

According to the amount of bacon I just cooked. I’m a family of 8.

Just shared via Threads:

When I said there’s no such thing as a dumb question, I didn’t expect them to take it as a personal challenge.

Just shared via Slack:

If you ever think you can solve a parenting problem by doing the opposite of what didn’t work last time, the universe will just be like “Lol, nice try, dummy!”

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Turns out I am the autistic one at “movie night,” who thought you’re supposed to actually watch the movie.

Spotted on Discord:

I am half agony, half hope.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Last year I had no valentine, this year I also have no valentine. Consistency!

Seen just now on Messenger:

Heavy on the ‘mhm,’ cause people just be talking.

Just shared via Slack:

I tell my kids winning isn’t everything and then I steal money from the monopoly bank.

Just landed via TikTok:

I hate it when you ask what you thought was a simple question in a meeting at work, and it turns into another meeting.

Making waves on TikTok:

More dangerous than a lion that roars is a woman gone silent.

Funny rickman quotes

Funny Rickman quotes bring a dash of wit and charm to your day! 😄 Whether you’re a fan of his iconic roles or just love clever humor, these gems never fail to crack a smile. 🎭✨ Get ready to laugh, reminisce, and maybe even quote along as we dive into some of the most memorable and hilarious lines from the legendary Alan Rickman! 🎬🔥

New funny rickman quotes 👇

All funny rickman quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

70 shares on Messenger this month:

Biting your tongue while eating is a perfect example of how you can still screw up, even with decades of experience.

41 shares on Messenger this month:

My robot vacuum and I are cut from the same cloth. When we see a line of dirt on the kitchen floor, we just spin around and go the other way.

37 shares on TikTok this month:

I always do my best sleeping in the 10 minutes before my alarm goes off.

45 shares on WeChat this month:

The only way the climate is going to change is if it first admits it has a problem, there’s really nothing we can do.

29 shares on Pinterest this month:

Can’t wait to put up holiday lights so life can be equally crappy but festively so.

20 shares on X this month:

I really love playing chess with elderly people in the park, but it’s just really hard to find thirty-two of them willing to do it.

27 shares on Snapchat this month:

Objection your honor, if the prosecutor doesn’t have anything nice to say then he shouldn’t say anything at all.

66 shares on Telegram this month:

My chess strategy is eating one of your pieces every time you look away.

10 shares on Twitch this month:

I would love to be the reason you look at your phone and smile. Then walk into a wall.

36 shares on Threads this month:

Just blocked someone for correcting my spelling and it feelded great.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

9 folks are currently checking 👀

You come from dust and you’ll return to dust, so that’s why I never dust. It could be someone I know.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Startup idea: Instagram, but it only shows you posts from people you follow, and they’re in chronological order.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

No pre-workout, just flashbacks of stuff I let slide.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Me: Hello, darkness, my old friend. Darkness: I have a boyfriend.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

The best part of my kid graduating was unsubscribing from the school’s text messages.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Architects should try and design a house with no yelling.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Whoever named the meatball absolutely nailed it.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

My level of sarcasm’s gotten to a point where I don’t even know if I’m kidding or not.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

AI could never replace me, you can’t put this much self-loathing into a machine.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Be the reason someone burns sage.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,675

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇬 has bookmarked:

Going to all the Halloween parties this year as the Invisible Man.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

They say we learn from our mistakes, that’s why I’m making as many as possible. Soon I’ll be a genius.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

When I say “the other day”, it can be anytime between yesterday and my birth.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

Handyman to customer: If I had wanted you to watch me work, I would have become an actor.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has viewed:

I put my pants on like everyone else. With hope they still fit.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

When I get filthy rich, I will stay humble by continuing to use grocery bags as bathroom trash bags.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has shared:

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has copied:

Two of the best things in life are laughing and orgasms. I want to make you do both a lot.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has viewed:

Whoever has my voodoo doll, please put some money in its pocket.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

Has someone told the whales that they can’t sing?

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Words I heard most when I ran errands with my dad: “Wait in the truck.”

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

A dating app called Unhinged where you agree to meet up and fight each other.

Going viral on Instagram:

I wonder if Van Halen realized they were writing music just to lift weights to.

Just shared via YouTube:

I’m going to write a book about all the things I should have done with my life. l’ll call it my oughtabiography.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

They should invent a day where I don’t wonder why.

Going viral on Reddit:

You’re old if you’re excited to learn how to play Mahjong.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I wish my doctor would put down a little treat to distract me like my vet does for my dog.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

I invoiced my boss two extra hours for the dream I had about work last night. I’m considering that overtime.

Live now on X:

Glad to be born at a time when I got to see what life was like before the internet, and will be dead before AI completely destroys humanity.

Breaking via Telegram:

Social media may have been a mistake.

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