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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇴🇲 has downloaded:

By the power vested in me by Facebook, I now pronounce you unfriended and restricted. You may now kiss my butt.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

Time travel is all well and good, but I feel so stupid right now. None of them have the mustache. No way to tell which baby is Hitler.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

I don’t trust anyone who gets enraged over messed-up fast food orders.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

Can someone please help me, I’m still at the Fyre Festival.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

The main problem is that far too many people have far too easy access to podcast equipment.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

God, never seen San Francisco this bad. Spiderwebs completely covering entire business, skeletons just strewn about sidewalks in every neighborhood. Things have got to change!

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

You are what you eat! (If anyone needed more encouragement to eat the rich.)

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

Spending all my money on lottery tickets so I’ll either be rich or poor, none of this wishy-washy stuff in the middle.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

I’m bored, but not “read a book for fun” bored.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

Ask your girlfriend for her ring size and then give her a personalized bowling ball.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2334 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,496

Funny Quotes Topics

15,197

Funny Quotes Images

12,496

Updated

24 minutes ago

Users Online

3,435

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Wiping my hands on my pants before I’m shaking someone’s hand, so they spend the rest of the day wondering what I just touched.

Spotted on Facebook:

The best cuddles are the ones where you don’t have to deflate her when you’re done.

Reported on Messenger:

I’m so good at missing early morning meetings, I can do it with my eyes closed.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

I’m still trying to dig myself out my ringtone debt from the late 90’s.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

If you’re cremated after you die, you can be put into an hourglass and continue to participate in family game night.

Going viral on Slack:

Y’all scared to be single, I’m scared to be in another pointless relationship.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Having a pool is so neat. All of your friends are suddenly interested to catch up on the hottest days of the year.

Live now on Twitch:

Don’t blame a clown for acting like a clown. Ask yourself why you keep going to the circus.

Going viral on Telegram:

Halloween is over and most people just keep on being creepy.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Don’t play with the feelings I barely have.

Home » Funny Satellite Quotes

Funny satellite quotes

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For even more funny satellite quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny satellite quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2334 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,496

Funny Quotes Topics

15,197

Funny Quotes Images

12,496

Updated

24 minutes ago

Users Online

3,442

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

I’ve never seen anything sadder than me in a black cape under the salon lights with wet hair parted incorrectly by a solid inch.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

Arguing through text will have you standing in one spot for 40 mins.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has bookmarked:

Riding a bike is an insane concept. You just sit and run at the same time.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

On the whole, people are getting smarter. I remember when they had to put “The End” on the screen, so people would know the movie was over.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

Silently hoping for a comet to strike, to get out of today’s responsibilities.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

Can we get some A.I. to pick plastic out of the ocean, or do all the robots need to be poets?

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

If only men knew the power “I made reservations, I’ll pick you up at 7” held instead of “I don’t know, whatever you wanna do.”

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

Can’t believe penguins have to publish all those books with their tiny hands.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

Gender and sexuality aside, I believe everyone just wants someone who wears short shorts and makes a lot of noise in bed.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has viewed:

Cursing after hitting oneself can reduce the pain by up to 50%.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on LinkedIn:

The next time someone texts me “we need to talk,” I’ll reply, “Yes, we really need to talk,” so that I won’t be the only one stressing.

Seen just now on Telegram:

When I retire, I’m going to run for office.

Just landed via Instagram:

Having a low quality camera will definitely force you to keep your life private.

Just shared via WeChat:

Nearly choked on a carrot. A donut would never do that to me.

Trending via Discord:

What if instead of Big Mac it was Big Matt and he came out and said hello to you?

Live now on WeChat:

The French only eat snails because they don’t like fast food.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I want a man who doesn’t annoy me while I’m constantly getting on his nerves. It can’t be that difficult.

Reported on WhatsApp:

I don’t do “casual.” I’m like an 18th-century vampire. When I fall in love, my devotion is boundless and eternal.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

Zen and the Art of Empty Pockets.

Going viral on Reddit:

Babies invented being in a bad mood for no reason, and they continue to innovate in the field.

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