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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇫 has shared:

“This was on sale!” is why I’m always broke.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

I was having a great time until I remembered that I was ugly.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

I just want someone to miss me the way my 3 year old nephew misses me when I go to the washroom.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

“Quit” is not in my vocabulary but “resign”, “drop out”, and “give up” are.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

If I had known how much care balcony plants need, I could have stopped taking the pill.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has bookmarked:

People who pee in the shower, have you thought about peeing before you get in the shower?

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

Don’t buy roses for her, buy chicken nuggets. Show her you really care.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has copied:

Harmonicas are basically for people who like to hear music while they spit.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

If an alien is 60 million light years away and is watching us through a telescope, it will see dinosaurs.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has viewed:

Remember the good old days when you didn’t have to wonder if the person messaging you was a bot or not?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1799 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,961

Funny Quotes Topics

14,758

Funny Quotes Images

11,961

Updated

20 seconds ago

Users Online

3,448

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Facebook:

Instead of those cute mini pizzas, they should invent gigantic ones that take four people to carry.

Shared recently on Slack:

Some things are better left unsaid, which I usually realize after I say them.

Going viral on Discord:

You look like you suck at Mario Kart.

Trending via Snapchat:

If you’re feeling lonely, start a small business. Then you’ll have a little company.

Going viral on Reddit:

I like to do a task by worrying about it for three weeks and then finally dedicating 10 solid minutes to completing it.

Live now on Facebook:

Kinda rude my neighbors live next to me.

Seen just now on Instagram:

I miss when we didn’t know what celebrities thought about anything.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Me summer vacation planning: I’m going to Europe. Bank account: You’re going camping.

Making waves on X:

Every citizen over 18 should be eligible to be drafted into the Postal Service.

Just landed via Twitch:

Everyone focused on the lip filler, but it’s really the chin filler that is the real villain.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1799 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,961

Funny Quotes Topics

14,758

Funny Quotes Images

11,961

Updated

20 seconds ago

Users Online

3,435

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

People who live in glass houses should be put on a watchlist.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

I’m actually breaking generational curses by surviving my 20s without marrying a man who hates me.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

I wrote a book. It’s a murder mystery. You’re in it but only for the first couple of chapters.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

My keyboard must be broken, I keep hitting the escape key, but I’m still at work.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

Don’t compare yourself with others. Everyone is better than you.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

Should I ever be mean and insulting, then it comes from the bottom of my heart.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

Whenever my Mother-in-Law’s stories end with “And I turned out OK” I’m looking around like who’s gonna tell her.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

I didn’t lose an hour of sleep. The hour of sleep lost me.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has downloaded:

Why is no one talking about the sheer pleasure of coming home from vacation and using your own bathroom.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

Therapy isn’t about being “fixed.” It’s about being your therapist’s favorite patient.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Horrifying if literal: my girlfriend is a gym rat.

Breaking via Instagram:

My favourite adult hack is when I carefully and thoughtfully put something very important away so I can’t lose it, and then I never find it again.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Who called it a heatwave and not a temperature tantrum?

Seen just now on X:

UK rappers be like “I’ve got a posh flat and my bird is very comely, I own more motors than the marchioness of cholmondeley”

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Hey man, be careful on the trampoline, one of my buddies never came back down.

Going viral on Messenger:

Sorry I’m late, there was bubble wrap.

Going viral on Messenger:

How dare you? I’m literally the sweetest most rage filled person on earth.

Trending via Reddit:

As a child, my family’s mealtime menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Life is so funny because you think you look good today and a year later you look even better.

Just landed via Discord:

The cool thing about being a procrastinator is, really bad ideas also don’t ever make it off the ground.

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