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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

Having a toddler is wild. I’m getting breaking news about Peppa Pig.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

If I ever go missing, promise me that you won’t put my weight on the poster.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

The first guy to clap after seeing something cool must have been like “what the hell am I doing?”

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

The secret ingredient to being really funny is childhood trauma.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

Who called it America and not the fast food and the furious?

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

Arkansas is just Kansas for pirates.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

Turns out that ending meetings with “have the day you deserve” has made me some enemies at work.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

Sorry, I can’t hang out tomorrow. I hung out with people a week ago and I’m still recovering from that.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

There are people on TV who are not ruined by fame, but who ruin fame.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

Hear me out. What if we don’t elect another president, and we all just promise to be really good?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1799 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,961

Funny Quotes Topics

14,758

Funny Quotes Images

11,961

Updated

5 minutes ago

Users Online

3,455

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Discord:

As a proud husband and father in my 40s, my New Year’s resolution is to sneeze even louder this year.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Grape soda doesn’t taste at all like grapes, but it does taste like purple, and I don’t know how to explain that.

Shared recently on Reddit:

The hairdresser asking me what special plans I have for the day like this wasn’t it.

Shared recently on WeChat:

He was only called Mr. Pepper until he published his groundbreaking research on fizzics.

Going viral on TikTok:

I came, I saw, I took a selfie as proof that I came and saw.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I used to party all night. Now I check the weather forecast for the next day to see if it’s a good laundry day.

Just shared via WeChat:

Elections make you feel like we’re all in divorce court waiting to see who gets custody of us.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I’m often mistaken for an adult because of my age.

Seen just now on Discord:

Unlike the stomach, the brain doesn’t alert you when it’s empty.

Making waves on Twitch:

Yesterday, thieves broke into my home. They searched everywhere and found nothing. They beat me up, telling me to work harder.

Home » Funny Sleep Paralysis Quotes

Funny sleep paralysis quotes

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All funny sleep paralysis quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1799 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,961

Funny Quotes Topics

14,758

Funny Quotes Images

11,961

Updated

5 minutes ago

Users Online

3,445

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

Pleasantly surprised to discover the treadmill I bought came with a remote control, so I can run it from my recliner.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has viewed:

I’m not a 10. I’m more like two 5s held together by cheese and chocolate.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

I don’t need all of these heat advisory warnings on my phone. I’ve been outside. I have skin. I know.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

You live in a great city when you get pooped on by a seagull instead of a pigeon.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has viewed:

“What’s a random act of kindness you’ve done for a stranger recently?” I helped a bunch of teens buy alcohol and cigarettes the other day.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

Happy Earth Day. You don’t look a day over 4 billion years and get hotter every year.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

Drinking a beer alone with terrible posture.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

Welcome to middle age. “I carried a watermelon” has gone from a movie quote to something you tell your orthopedist.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

I think Australians should have to go three rounds in the ring with a kangaroo before they eat him.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has viewed:

My mind is like someone dumped the entire junk drawer on a trampoline.

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on WhatsApp:

People don’t catch bullets with their teeth anymore, get out there and practice.

Going viral on Snapchat:

With a lollipop in one hand and a dandelion in the other, concentration is very important, as every summer child knows.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I like you because we hate the same people.

Just shared via Discord:

Your 20s are for trying soup, making new soups, and discussing soup or soup related topics.

Spotted on Facebook:

New challenge called “don’t say ‘wow it’s already dark by five these days’ for the rest of winter”

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Accessories can really boost a woman’s self-confidence. For example, I know I would feel 10x sexier if I carried a sword with me at all times.

Just landed via Threads:

I’ve just filed a restraining order against reality.

Freshly posted on X:

I can melt an ice cube just by staring at it. It takes a while, but I can do it.

Breaking via Pinterest:

I’m not shy. I just don’t like you.

Broadcasted on X:

Be the reason why your local woods are haunted.

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