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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

Technology has really helped me waste my time efficiently.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

The best thing about work is the coffee machine and the drive home.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has shared:

I just need a little time to warm up to you, and then I’ll be super fun, I promise—1-2 years at most.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has bookmarked:

What are some good jobs for someone with no passions, interests, motivation, social skills, or strengths?

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

Welcome to your 50s… A new pain will be be assigned to you shortly.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

Sometimes the laugh is funnier than the joke itself.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

I’m multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has shared:

The smarter you are, the more important it is for you to figure out how to think less.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

Do you ever stress about money, then accidentally order from Amazon?

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

Twitter is the only place where well-articulated sentences still get misinterpreted. You can say “I like pancakes,” and somebody will say, “So you hate waffles?”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2419 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,581

Funny Quotes Topics

15,252

Funny Quotes Images

12,581

Updated

7 minutes ago

Users Online

3,459

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Telegram:

Days without shaking my head disapprovingly at myself: 0.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Is everything expensive or am I just poor?

Shared recently on Instagram:

Welcome to Netflix. We have every movie but the one you actually want to watch.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Brain, I know you’re trying hard, but you are not doing a good job.

Shared recently on Facebook:

The best part of the relationship is before you meet them, and you’re single.

Going viral on TikTok:

The week before your period doesn’t make any sense… until you realize it’s the week before your period.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

As parents we have to make sacrifices all the time. Today, I had to eat my kid’s ice cream because she couldn’t finish it.

Making waves on Facebook:

Just peed so much that a little laugh came out.

Reported on Threads:

I always bring a glass of water to bed with me so I have something to knock over in the middle of the night.

Seen just now on Facebook:

I asked myself if I was the problem and we said no.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2419 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,581

Funny Quotes Topics

15,252

Funny Quotes Images

12,581

Updated

7 minutes ago

Users Online

3,447

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

That’s not my girl bestie, that’s my platonic wife.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

Relationships are actually easy when you’re not dating a lying weirdo.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

Don’t ask me ‘how are you?’ unless you’re willing to sign an NDA.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

Got so emotional thinking about the Toy Story aliens. They have each other.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

I always wait 3 minutes after each post for the applause to die down.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has downloaded:

A Tinder type app, but it matches you with sandwiches.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

Sorry, I’m late. I got here when I wanted to.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has downloaded:

Sometimes, I wonder what my life would be like if I had a good haircut.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

Don’t scare me, I fart easily.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

The ability to adjust your vocabulary based on who you’re speaking to is a valuable life skill that many people lack.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Twitch:

According to your ex, what’s exactly wrong with you?

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Laptops become possessed with slowness when they see that you are in a hurry.

Just shared via Reddit:

I don’t expect everything handed to me, just set it down outside my door.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Tom and Jerry fooled me into thinking dogs bullied cats when it’s the opposite in reality.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Avoid calls from pesky bill collectors by not paying your phone bill.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

If someone steals your joke, you have to file a LOLsuit.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Someone asked me what my hobby was and I realized that my favorite hobby is doing absolutely nothing.

Trending via Messenger:

I don’t like being asked “are you at home?” Please expand further so I can know whether I’m at home or not.

Spotted on Discord:

I usually decompose after work rather than decompress.

Breaking via Pinterest:

I put on my Godzilla costume, then go to the miniature golf course to beat up the windmill.

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