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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇱 has downloaded:

I will never sell out my integrity unless I am offered something for it.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

Tried to sleep by reading a boring book and now it’s suddenly the most interesting book.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

They should invent a political party that doesn’t suck.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

Me, in heaven: Can you take a photo of me sitting on that cloud?

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

I’ve finally found a book that speaks to me. I believe it’s called an “audiobook”.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has bookmarked:

Your brain automatically translates WTF but not LOL.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

I can’t blame this generation too much for doing stupid stuff. My generation thought seven Police Academy movies were a good idea.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

“Your call is very important to us. Please stay on the line until your call is no longer important to you.”

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

Why trust atoms? Because they’ve never been caught fibbing, just fission.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

You know it’s been a successful Thanksgiving when your clothes no longer fit.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1832 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,994

Funny Quotes Topics

14,796

Funny Quotes Images

11,994

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,436

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Threads:

Children are so giving. For example, my kids gave me a cold.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

There’s really nothing as pathetic as watching a sad little man argue with Grok in hopes of manipulating the conversation to get an answer he wants.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I still make time for all my favorite hobbies, like drinking, swearing, and making people feel uncomfortable.

Spotted on Telegram:

If your boyfriend insists he rolls everywhere because it’s ‘faster than walking’, you may be dating a gamer.

Reported on X:

I have a huge to-do list, I just have to figure out who’s gonna do it.

Shared recently on WeChat:

If only men knew the power “I made reservations, I’ll pick you up at 7” held instead of “I don’t know, whatever you wanna do.”

Just shared via LinkedIn:

If God had known what mankind would turn into, he would have sterilized Adam.

Trending via Reddit:

I birthed my kid faster than she can put on shoes.

Trending via X:

Women are able to leave the country unexpectedly at any time with the contents of their handbag.

Just shared via Threads:

I think you would all treat me a lot better if I possessed a small amount of plutonium.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1832 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,994

Funny Quotes Topics

14,796

Funny Quotes Images

11,994

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,431

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

The man who invented autocorrect walks into a barn. He orders a bear.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

Cupid’s arrow should have just killed me instead.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has downloaded:

Sorry for being late, I was enjoying my last few minutes of not being here.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

Blocking someone isn’t enough; I need their PornHub videos to always buffer, just as they’re about to climax.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

Why do my fully charged AirPods deplete at different rates? Do I listen harder out of one ear?

Someone from 🇭🇺 has downloaded:

Sunday night: Super Bowl party! Monday morning: Toilet Bowl party!

Someone from 🇨🇷 has viewed:

Hilarious when peoples outgoing voicemail message says they “can’t make it to the phone right now.” You carry the phone with you. It’s the only constant in your life.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

For those who don’t want Alexa listening in on your conversations, they’re making a male version that doesn’t listen to anything.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

It’s not even a crush. it’s just unsupervised hope.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

Sometimes the universe puts you in the same situations again to see if you’re still an idiot.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via YouTube:

Sorry I was late, I was frantically applying to other jobs.

Just shared via Discord:

If Shakespeare were being born today, he’d be “Shaxxespyr.”

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I’m writing a book of obitchuaries for all the people who are dead to me.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Shoulda named my daughter Calculus cause damn she’s complicated.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Life is basically avoiding people who have seen you naked, whilst trying to find new people to see you naked.

Reported on Discord:

Unpopular opinion: The moon is actually way more useful than the sun. Because the moon gives us light at night when it’s dark. The sun only gives us light during the day when it’s already bright.

Making waves on X:

This meeting could have been an unread email.

Seen just now on Reddit:

My phone screen is brighter than my future.

Trending via Instagram:

Having teens is fun because they demand their independence but then turn right around and ask you for $20.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Who is praying on my downfall right now and can you stop?

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