Commentary:
This is why my bookshelf doubles as a witness protection program 📚😂🔍
20 Funny 12 quotes
I’m still repaying karmic debt from that time I was 12 and gave the middle finger to a cow at the state fair.
Commentary:
Still trying to tip the scales with good deeds so that cow doesn't come back in my next life 🐄✌️😅
If Keith Richards survived the ’70s, the ’80s, and 1.2 million Marlboros, I can probably survive anything.
Commentary:
Keith Richards is the ultimate survival guide! 💀🚬 If he can conquer the Marlboro marathon, we can handle a traffic jam. Let's rock on! 🎸😎
“Is everything okay?” Bro, nothing has been since I turned 12.
Commentary:
Nothing's been okay since I realized recess wasn't a lifelong event 😂🤷♂️ #AdultingIsHard
Every Microsoft Teams invite you get lowers your testosterone by 1-2%
Commentary:
"Looks like Microsoft Teams is not just decreasing productivity, but also decreasing manliness! 💻👨💼 Watch out for those invites, guys – your testosterone levels might take a hit! 😂 #TechProblems"
Day 12 without chocolate: Lost all hearing in my left eye.
A 12 step program but it’s just me getting off the couch.
Nobody told me that it takes 1-2 business days to put a snow outfit on a toddler.
Commentary:
"Who knew dressing a toddler for the snow was a part-time job with its own delivery schedule? ⏳❄️ Just add it to the list of 'skills required for parenting' along with negotiation tactics and advanced snack hiding techniques! 😂👶 #ToddlerSnowFashionista"
I bought a 12 year old whiskey. His parents are furious.
Commentary:
Looks like that whiskey was a real troublemaker! 😄🥃 Maybe it's too young to be causing a stir, but hey, age is just a number in the world of spirits! 😉 #WhiskeyShenanigans
Why did Star Wars Episodes 4, 5 & 6 come out before 1,2 & 3? Because in charge of directing, Yoda was.
Commentary:
Well, it seems like Yoda knew the best order for the Star Wars movies! Maybe he had a sneak peek into the future with the Force. 🌌🎬 May the release date be with you, always!