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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

No haunted houses for me this year. If I wanna be frightened, I’ll just look at my 401k.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

An escape room, but it’s just your high school reunion.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

My favorite thing to do on the weekend is not leave my house.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

Miso soup is such a silly name, like “Yes, you so soup.”

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

Seaweed is great for when you want to eat pure salt but wish it had the texture of slime.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has bookmarked:

My biggest fear is waking up and being in the Renaissance era or something. Imagine having the knowledge of hot dogs but lacking the tools to make them.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has shared:

So, you’re telling me I’m just supposed to get up every day and keep living like this? Seems like a scam to me.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

We need a streaming service that’s only ads. No shows, just commercials. They pay us $15 a month.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

Would pay $10 a month for Summer Premium Package without wasps.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

Everyday is leg day when you’re running from your problems.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2414 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,576

Funny Quotes Topics

15,246

Funny Quotes Images

12,576

Updated

32 minutes ago

Users Online

3,465

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WeChat:

The Slow and the Furious: me navigating a shopping cart through a grocery store filled with morons.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Dear algorithm, please show this post only to people who have innate psionic abilities and would use their abilities for the betterment of humanity if given a chance.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

“Stop bouncing your leg!” It’s either this or I start screaming.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

I don’t get vegetables on my pizza because I don’t like mixing business with pleasure.

Breaking via Telegram:

Our parents just don’t know how far we rode the bikes when we were young.

Trending via Slack:

Strangers vomiting their beliefs all over you every day is not good for the soul.

Spotted on Pinterest:

We can put a man on the moon but we can’t find a good way to drink wine from a lying down position.

Trending via Slack:

These weekends are starting to feel as long as a lunch break.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

I’m giving up eating chocolate for a month. Sorry, bad punctuation. I’m giving up. Eating chocolate for a month.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Running to the boarding gate is my favorite workout.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Trending Topics 📁

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2414 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,576

Funny Quotes Topics

15,246

Funny Quotes Images

12,576

Updated

32 minutes ago

Users Online

3,446

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

I fondly remember my days as a younger man when I didn’t care what the weather was going to do.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

All I’ve ever wanted is to look good naked, hope that someone can take it.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

My favorite 90s skill: Uninstalling my car stereo and hiding it in my glove box in under 15 seconds.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

Do you think I’ll read a book again at some point or will I continue to dumb myself down with 12 hours of screen time?

Someone from 🇰🇪 has viewed:

Staying in bed all day is my way of saving money.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

No, I don’t comment, I voodoo doll like a real adult.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

You know you don’t have to give your bathroom a beach theme, there’s no law.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has downloaded:

Coffee just tastes better when you are the only one awake in the morning.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

The fewer friends at your birthday party means more cake for you. Follow me for more life hacks.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

You can tell a lot about someone by the stuff you make up in your head about them.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Twitch:

Kissing while both wearing baseball caps is so hard. How do baseball players do it?

Spotted on Telegram:

The word Ohio looks like a tractor.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Everyone is using AI to write business emails, texts, etc. At this point in time, we may as well just tell our AIs to talk to each other and then let us know what kind of deal they worked out.

Just shared via X:

The week between Christmas and New Year’s should be studied as it is clearly a wormhole, disturbing time and space.

Going viral on Instagram:

I want to be cremated so that I will get a smoking-hot body again.

Shared recently on X:

French fries are like the lifeboats on the Titanic. They never give you enough.

Making waves on Reddit:

I hate when an old man tries to friend me on Facebook and then I realize we went to high school together.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

I need a massage for my brain.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Wrapping gifts on the floor after 50: 1% holiday spirit, 99% figuring out how to stand up without calling for help.

Live now on TikTok:

Please twerk; I have just days left.

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