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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇬 has viewed:

Good morning to everyone except the people who are missing the ability to read the room.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

Cheer up! Your biggest mistake is probably still ahead of you.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

Sorry I missed your call when I pressed decline.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

Whenever I feel like I hate my job, I remind myself that I could be a food taster for the emperor.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

When you drink red wine from a cup, it looks like fruit tea and you are also admired by others for your healthy lifestyle.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

Ex’s be like “I gave you everything”. Yeah, trust issues.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

We’d never met, or even spoken, but I could tell just from gazing into her pale blue eyes I had stepped on her toe.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

How bad can a decision really be if nobody from the future shows up to stop you?

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

Sorry boys, but I’ve already got my eyes on a guy who’s not interested.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

My life is just a series of awkward moments separated by snacks.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

804 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,966

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,966

Updated

23 minutes ago

Users Online

3,436

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Reddit:

The way that we’re constantly told not to eat silica gel makes me suspect that it contains all the world’s forbidden knowledge.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

For my birthday, I want everyone to delete whatever old version of me they have in their head— it expired.

Seen just now on Messenger:

I’m changing the game. I’m starting to thank people from the top of my heart.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

He’s a 10 but so is his volume.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Olympic gymnast: does the most amazing thing I have ever seen in my entire life. Announcer: Oh dear, that will be a point deduction.

Going viral on Pinterest:

If you’re a squatter, every day is leg day.

Breaking via Threads:

Don’t hate me, date me!

Trending via Pinterest:

I get sad whenever they’re mean to Zoidberg in Futurama.

Spotted on Instagram:

I want to be so rich that when I see a spider in my house I won’t kill it, I’d buy another house.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Picking up a hitchhiker is not worth the risk of being forced to make small talk with a stranger.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

804 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,966

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,966

Updated

23 minutes ago

Users Online

3,441

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇼 has copied:

I wanted to sleep it off, but insomnia said, “Not tonight, buddy.”

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

I childproofed my house but the kids still get in somehow.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

Yesterday, I went to the grocery store, and I managed to come home without any junk food. Now, I’m mad that we don’t have any junk food.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has shared:

I am crumbling under the tyranny of constantly needing to ‘Create an Account’.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

I’m uncomfortable around tall people. What if they pick me up and put me on their shoulders?

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

If you wanna make someone cry, just show them the earliest year they can retire.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

Oh really? We’ll see what the same six people who always agree with me think about that.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

We put a man on the moon in 1969, and if you elect me to be your president, I promise that we will not stop until every man is on the moon.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

Opinions are like air fryers. Everyone’s got one and they won’t stop banging on about them.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

If we were both crows, I’d bring you shiny things.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Threads:

My signature move is waving at someone who is waving at the person behind me.

Trending via Reddit:

Jury duty is a wild concept. Whenever the government wants, they can just be like “Call off work, bestie, we need you to solve a murder. Here’s fifteen dollars.”

Seen just now on WeChat:

Third wheeling with two girls who are best friends is so much worse than third wheeling a couple.

Making waves on Twitch:

Spoiler alert: Eventually you will pay a price for the way you treated people.

Going viral on Snapchat:

If I text you at 8:10, you’re supposed to reply at 8:09.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

My goal is to do one thing each day that could prevent me from being elected to political office.

Just shared via WeChat:

I should have peed before I left, and other things I’ll never learn: A memoir

Reported on Threads:

Being excited to get in bed is a different level of adulting.

Trending via Facebook:

Never go to bed angry. Stay up and finish the argument like an adult.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

I should’ve been an air conditioner because all I do is vent.

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