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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

My new drivers license arrived and when I opened it, I gasped. How’d they get a picture of my mother?

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

I’ve already picked out my sweatpants for New Year’s Eve.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

Alligators can live up to 100 years which is why there is an increased chance that they will see you later.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

I always thought that aunts had a lot of money. Until I became one myself.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

I eat cake because it’s somebody’s birthday somewhere.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

“Don’t let me keep you!” Translation: Please go.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

I’m not athletic, but I’m good at jumping to conclusions.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has viewed:

The only thing worse than a nightmare is waking up from a great dream before you get to see how it ends.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

I’ve tasted being the bigger person, I’ve also tasted matching energy. I recommend no contact.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

Wish my metabolism worked as fast as my anxiety.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2440 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,602

Funny Quotes Topics

15,268

Funny Quotes Images

12,602

Updated

28 minutes ago

Users Online

3,461

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Threads:

My first rodeo and my last rodeo were the same rodeo.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Boyfriends come and go… reply guys stay forever. Against your will, even.

Just landed via WeChat:

Today I told my daughter she’s giving me a headache! She told me “For suggestions and complaints, contact the manufacturer.”

Trending via WhatsApp:

I hate when my cat runs into my bedroom and hisses at an empty chair, then runs back out again; and I then have to fall asleep holding a crucifix.

Seen just now on TikTok:

According to this box of macaroni and cheese, I am an entire family.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

It’s a paradox that your nose is running and your feet smell.

Live now on WeChat:

I should’ve been an air conditioner because all I do is vent.

Just landed via Messenger:

Chugging a woman’s entire drink at the bar and then saying “you’re safe, there is nothing in your drink.”

Reported on Threads:

For International Women’s Day, I’m going to celebrate by hitting every curb I see.

Making waves on Discord:

Everything is dishwasher safe if you don’t care enough about it.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2440 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,602

Funny Quotes Topics

15,268

Funny Quotes Images

12,602

Updated

28 minutes ago

Users Online

3,446

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

I’m staying up past midnight this New Year’s eve. Not to welcome the new year, but to make sure this one is over.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

Does the HDMI cord have the most dominant run of any cord ever?

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

Instead of studying, I like to stay on my phone and worry about how I’m going to pass.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has viewed:

Getting accused of using AI when you didn’t is like this century’s version of a witch allegation.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

One downside of marrying a doctor is you have to give up eating apples.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has shared:

The first step to recovery is addiction.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

Hey, sorry I cant make it tonight. I am beset on all sides by foes.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

I want to sleep but my brain won’t stop talking to itself.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

I hate when I gain 10 pounds for a role and then realize I’m not an actor.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

I deserve a dragon after all I’ve been through.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WeChat:

If women came with instructions, men wouldn’t read them anyway.

Live now on X:

I’m here by unpopular demand.

Going viral on Telegram:

I think some of you are faking your sarcasms.

Just landed via Twitch:

I’ve realized there’s more to life than social media, so I guess this is goodbye for the next 12 minutes.

Just shared via Threads:

My husband and I fell in love at first sight. Maybe I should have taken a second look.

Going viral on Slack:

Brussels sprouts were invented by big cabbage to sell little cabbages.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

The state of my house can best be described as “there seems to have been a struggle”.

Making waves on YouTube:

Maybe if we all sit extremely still, Monday won’t be able to see us.

Going viral on Discord:

Second day without coffee. I can no longer hear out of my left eye.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Please stop assuming that too many em dashes mean AI written. Some of us are producing grammatically incoherent work the honest way!

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