Grown men carpooling to the strip club so they can get boners and drive home together.

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Them: Good morning! Me: Where?

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I pray this boy wins in life. I wanna see him on top of me.

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I am not “quiet quitting”, I am suffering from third-degree burnout.

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Welcome to downtown where the crosswalk signals are merely suggestions and you hope the puddles are water.

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Everybody loves that comfort food until you end up with that comfort body.

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Whatever you ask the Universe for under this post, you will get next week.

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I just heard someone refer to Texas as “Howdy Arabia” and I still haven’t stopped laughing.

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According to a new study, people who often trail off in the middle of a sentence are 30% more likely to

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I love being left to my own devices. It’s like yeah, these are my devices.

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It’s amazing how cats can ignore you with both ears.