17 funny male quotes - Wordgag

I have re-entered the Band of Brothers rewatch stage of male depression.

May 30, 2026

Grown men carpooling to the strip club so they can get boners and drive home together.

May 30, 2026

Geopolitics for dudes is like pure sex. Almost like the male mind was built for this.

May 29, 2026

Crazy to think the average Zoomer male just works, watches porn, and plays video games. That’s it. That’s their whole life.

May 29, 2026

Male barista called me “my love” yesterday and didn’t say it today… getting mixed signals and feeling really upset.

May 29, 2026

“I’m giving my daughter a male name, ain’t nobody cracking an Abdul.”

May 29, 2026

For those who don’t want Alexa listening in on your conversations, they’re making a male version that doesn’t listen to anything.

May 28, 2026

You ever meet an all-male friend group that is less a group of friends than it is “one guy and his henchmen”?

May 28, 2026

Men invented arm wrestling so they could hold hands and look into each other’s eyes.

May 27, 2026

Nobody gets angrier than a man being accused of something he actually did.

May 27, 2026

The male urge to tell you what business used to be located there back in his day.

May 27, 2026

You think you’ve seen gold diggers, until you see a male friend group where only one of them made it.

May 26, 2026

Male birth control is free, and it’s called wearing Crocs with socks.

May 26, 2026

“Male loneliness epidemic” and it’s just karma and the consequences of their actions.

May 25, 2026

Proudly doing my part to cause the male loneliness epidemic.

May 21, 2026

Performative male is kinda just a rebrand of metrosexual, which is just a way to say a straight guy is a little bit faggy.

May 19, 2026

After ejaculation, men automatically realize that everything is vanity upon vanity.

May 19, 2026