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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

I wanna date someone cuter than me, but sadly I am the cutest.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

You can tell it’s laundry day because I’m wearing flippers and a Viking helmet.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

The best part of getting older? I can wake up on my day off, without an alarm, at the same time my alarm would go off.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

In your 20s and 30s, you’ll start rediscovering the niche interests and hobbies you had as a kid. It’s very important you revisit them. Your younger self was actually on to something.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

My stomach just made the exact sound of the “your” in “your call has been forwarded to an automatic voice messaging system.”

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

“You’re in her DMs, my faint presence sits in her Spotify Wrapped through the music I introduced her to. We’re not the same.”

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

There’s no bigger test of patience than typing your email address in on a TV with the remote.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

Nothing messes up your Friday like realizing it’s only Thursday.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

These days, I only use Facebook as a birthday calendar.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

I know I’m mad when I start talking to myself about it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,332

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via TikTok:

Ain’t nothing better than knowing you were right when everyone else thought you were crazy.

Shared recently on Discord:

When animals lead you to a place, it’s so cute… like, yes, I’m still following. Thank you for constantly turning around to make sure.

Just shared via X:

Men used to smoke Marlboros. Now they cry when they lose their strawberry cheesecake vape.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

I don’t want to alarm anyone, but there’s only 365 shopping days left until Christmas.

Just shared via Discord:

Can’t wait for my husband to see what he bought everyone for Christmas.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Bro to bro: Never get your haircut on the day of a special event.

Trending via Reddit:

Police officer: please step out of your vehicle. Me: after this song, hold on.

Trending via Reddit:

There will never be a perfect time. Make that mistake now.

Going viral on Pinterest:

I think it’s clear that companies making medicine have no idea what fruits taste like.

Shared recently on Threads:

A hacker called me and said he had all my passwords. I got a pen and paper and said ‘Thank God for that, what are they?’

He doesn’t realize it yet, but this Saturday, I’ll be asking him to untangle 400 feet of Christmas lights.

3 weeks ago

Funny quote about a playful plan to ask for Christmas light help.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Untangling those lights will be his festive initiation, hope he's got a patience level set to 'zen master' 😂🕯️🎄🔍

asking, Christmas, Christmas light, decoration, feet, holiday, holiday preparation, light, lights, preparation, realize, relationship, Saturday, surprise, task, untangling

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Social Media Stars ⭐

24 shares on Reddit this month:

Seeking a date so intense even the candles are sweating.

17 shares on Pinterest this month:

We really do need a separate grocery store for people who’ve been on Earth before.

94 shares on X this month:

They’re selling me on Temu tomorrow.

99 shares on Facebook this month:

Whenever you feel like the world is falling apart, take a deep breath and remember you’re right.

82 shares on Messenger this month:

If you’re happy and you know it, you’re clearly not paying enough attention.

23 shares on Facebook this month:

Can’t believe I didn’t get invited to that party I would have made up an excuse not to go to.

74 shares on Threads this month:

It’s awkward touching hands with another man inside a popcorn bag, especially if you don’t know the man and he doesn’t know you’re eating his popcorn.

77 shares on Telegram this month:

Three words no parent ever wants to hear when dropping their kid at a play date: “Come on in.”

71 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m at an age now where I start sentences with “I’m at an age now.”

75 shares on Discord this month:

No matter how bad your day seems, just remember that someone out there has line danced to Achy Breaky Heart.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇭 has downloaded:

My mind not only wanders, sometimes it leaves completely!

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

Got possessed by a demon once, and everyone was like, “OMG, did you do something with your hair?”

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

Imagine how much better the world would be if everyone set aside their differences and came together as one to buy me a castle.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has downloaded:

Christmas is the season of giving, and I’m giving up for good.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

I have nothing in common with people who “forget to eat”.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

I’m so desperate for a vacation that at this point I’d spend an all inclusive week at Jurassic Park.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has downloaded:

Do not take me to an escape room. I was a c-section. Someone is gonna have to come get me.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

I have a condition that prevents me from dieting. It’s called being hungry.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

My AI-generated girlfriend is hotter than your real girlfriend.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has viewed:

I can’t wait for my mom to come to my new house so she can tell me how I organized the kitchen wrong.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Discord:

If you want to impress me with your car, it better be a food truck.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

My recliner and I go way back.

Just landed via Messenger:

Every time you give someone the benefit, they deliver the doubt.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

I want my house spotless, but kicking my kids out seems wrong.

Trending via TikTok:

Nothing worse than when I turn up to Park Run to find it is indeed going ahead.

Just landed via Reddit:

I set up my Nativity scene, but since baby Jesus hasn’t arrived yet, Mary, Joseph and all the Wise Men are just looking down at their phones.

Trending via Reddit:

You can’t spell fries without friends. I guess what I’m saying is that fries are friends. Delicious friends.

Making waves on Snapchat:

I’m attracted to people that no one pays attention to.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I keep pressing the space bar, but I’m still on Earth.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Starting conversations with short people by saying “back when I was your height…”

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

He doesn’t realize it yet, but this Saturday, I’ll be asking him to untangle 400 feet of Christmas lights.

Photos are cool because they are like now but for later.

Who called it a deep freeze instead of ice-o-lation?

I really understand why boomers text with ellipses between everything… it feels so good…

I had a million opportunities to waste money this year, and I took them all. In fact, even when there wasn’t an opportunity, I created one.

Sorry for how I acted when there were multiple noises happening at the same time.

Social Media Stars ⭐

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Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

He doesn’t realize it yet, but this Saturday, I’ll be asking him to untangle 400 feet of Christmas lights.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Photos are cool because they are like now but for later.

Who called it a deep freeze instead of ice-o-lation?

I really understand why boomers text with ellipses between everything… it feels so good…

I had a million opportunities to waste money this year, and I took them all. In fact, even when there wasn’t an opportunity, I created one.

Sorry for how I acted when there were multiple noises happening at the same time.

I be skipping everyone’s stories but watch mine like 20 times.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨