Hey boy, are you my period? Because you’re annoying as hell but I still wanna see you regularly.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

So you mean to tell me a stress ball isn’t for throwing at people who stress you out?

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

My family asked me what I wanted for Mother’s Day, so I packed their bags and changed the locks.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has shared:

It is easier to pass a camel through the eye of a needle than it is to convince somebody online that they are wrong.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has bookmarked:

There should be sympathy cards for having to go back to work after a vacation.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

The first time I see a jogger smiling, I’ll consider it.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

A little sign under the doorbell that says, “think twice, adventurer.”

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

I read all your bumper stickers and now we’re both stupid.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

Polar bears drinking Coca Cola is my favorite holiday vibe.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

I saw a spider crawl under my kid’s bed and was too tired to go after it, but that’s okay, no living creature can survive that environment.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

Not to brag, but I don’t need alcohol to send texts I’ll regret.